Breaking of the Day: All In One

Ebook cover for the arc

Tsuna is dragged off to Italy and starts to find his place. His place includes being Xanxus’ boss, and both of them have some adjusting to do to that idea. In the end, Tsuna has to take some extreme measures to make it happen. This arc features a sort of mental Tsuna/Xanxus.

Breaking of the Day

Tsuna gets taken off to Italy to get better acquainted with the Vongola. While he’s there, he has to come to some kind of terms with Xanxus. Kind of, sort of, mental Tsuna/Xanxus. Drama, I-4, some spoilers

"I can’t believe you told Kaa-san this was overseas study," Tsuna grumbled as he was frog-marched to his doom.

Well, all right, not really frog-marched, his dad had his hands in his pockets and Reborn wasn’t tall enough, but the effect was the same.

"It is overseas," his dad said, cheerily. "And it’s definitely higher education."

Tsuna glared at the double-doors they were approaching. He had never agreed to this. Well, not really. Not exactly.

"Cheer up," his dad advised. "It’s a job for life." While Tsuna was trying to find words for the magnitude of wrongness in that statement, his dad swept open the door with a perfectly ruthless smile and Tsuna was pinned in the doorway by the measuring stares of a lot of men in black suits.

"Tsuna." The Ninth smiled. "Welcome."

A rough snort cut through Tsuna’s fumbling thank-you, and he looked around to see Xanxus lounging in one of the chairs glaring death at him. His words ended on a strangled sound. The room was silent as the two of them stared at each other.

Finally Tsuna swallowed and took a breath. If he didn’t say something he would probably be here until he spontaneously combusted from the glare. "Xanxus-san," he managed. "It’s, um, good to see you again?"

Xanxus’ lip curled in a sneer but he finally turned the dark glower away, as if Tsuna was a bug he’d noticed only in passing, and Tsuna made it to the chair left empty without wobbling. Much.

It took him a while to register that a few of the stares around the table were now impressed, and he had to choke down hysterical laughter when he did.

What else was he supposed to say, after all? "Still going to kill everyone present to cover up murdering me, and by the way how’s the food around here?"

"So." The Ninth’s smile was a little too similar to Reborn’s for Tsuna’s comfort. "Shall we begin?"


"A war?!" Tsuna waved his arms to relieve his feelings, here in the safety of his own room. "Another? You brought me over here just in time for another?" He stopped, siezed by a horrible thought, and buried his fingers in his hair. "Or is it the same?"

"It isn’t the same," Reborn stated, far too calmly, as usual. "We’re pretty sure."

"Pretty sure?" Tsuna’s voice cracked.

Reborn shrugged. "We’re still tracing their headquarters."

"While they know exactly where we are. Great," Tsuna grumbled.

"That’s why the Varia were called here." Reborn sounded perfectly reasonable and Tsuna shuddered.

"Is he going to try to kill me again?" he asked with a certain morbid curiosity.

"Sooner or later, probably."

Tsuna threw himself onto his bed and pulled a pillow over his head. He didn’t know whether he was really glad or really regretting that he’d convinced Gokudera to stay in Japan while he spent six months "overseas study" in Italy.

Reborn hauled him out from under the pillow and dumped him on the floor. "Hurry up. You have another meeting to observe in five minutes."

The only reason Tsuna managed to keep shoot me now behind his teeth was because he knew Reborn would.


Tsuna cautiously eased out onto the terrace. Bullets had stopped zinging and the man in charge of interior security assured him the assault was over, but he’d heard a few of the stories about how many tunnels and hiding places this place had.

Besides, Xanxus was out here.

"You got them all?" he was asking Viper and Belphegor.

"All three," Viper confirmed while Belphegor cocked his head at Tsuna and smiled disturbingly. "If that really is all of their squad leaders this should put the crimp in their strategy we need…"

Tsuna stopped paying attention, because something in the trees caught his eye. It was something like a gleam, only dark instead of light, and his gaze followed it, puzzled at it, until it resolved into something that might be a very long gun.

Adrenaline kicked his heart hard and his teeth locked. He felt like he could see rings of air sliding down a long, straight path and he followed them with wide fixed eyes until they ended at…

Xanxus’ back.

No one else was looking, he could never push Xanxus hard enough to move him away, but he was already moving. He reached out but he’d seen the things Reborn could shoot, his hand wouldn’t even slow a bullet down. He needed something more. He was not going to let anyone be shot in front of him!

Need. Want. Will.

Flame.

The impact drove him back against Xanxus and the next few moments were a confusion of shouting and falling and someone’s boot in his ribs and the bullet safe in his hand. When it was done, Belphegor was gone from the terrace, the noise had moved over to the tree line, and Xanxus was staring down at him.

"What kind of a goddamn moron are you?"

Tsuna straightened up, coughing a little, and opened his hand to show the bullet resting in his glove.

"I know that! I’m going to kill you and you’re trying to protect me?" Xanxus spat on the flagstones. "The old bastard is senile, trying to make some limp little shit like you a boss!"

He stalked inside and Tsuna sighed. He knew it probably was a pretty stupid thing to do, but he couldn’t just watch even someone who wanted him dead shot. He couldn’t.

"A boss risks his life to protect the Family," Reborn said, appearing in the door. He looked Tsuna up and down and smiled faintly. "Not too bad."

Tsuna smiled back, shakily.

"We’ll work on new training, so you can call the Flame faster."

Tsuna slumped back against the wall, groaning. One of these days, he was going to learn.


Tsuna squirmed in his chair. He’d never been fond of watching meetings to start with, especially when they were in a language that, despite Reborn’s Dying Will Language Lessons, he only mostly understood, and lately they’d gotten a lot worse. The Vongola leaders were tense, people were dying, and Xanxus was watching him like a hawk and sneering every time Tsuna so much as twitched. It was as much as he could do not to stammer every time someone spoke to him.

"What has he got against me?" he wailed as Reborn and his dad saw him back to his room and checked it over. "Just that I’m alive?"

Reborn paused to whack him over the head. "Quit whining. And yes."

There were times Tsuna wished Dino-san had taught him how to swear, the way he’d joked about when he learned Tsuna was visiting Italy.

"Well, and his strength is the reason he had so much support for becoming boss," his dad added, looking carefully out the curtains. "The more people see of your strength, first hand, the less support he’ll have to keep holding off from serving you."

Tsuna stopped dead in the middle of the room and stared in abject horror.

"I told you a long time ago, didn’t I?" Reborn hopped up onto a chair and pulled open his gun case. "In a challenge for leadership, our tradition is that the loser serves under the winner."

Tsuna squeaked.

His dad waved a soothing hand. "Xanxus is the leader of the Varia and they’re directly under the Ninth. As long as the Ninth is alive, no one will bring any real pressure for him to swear to you." He scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Of course, he does owe you for his life, now, which probably isn’t helping."

"Life… huh? But…" Tsuna laughed uneasily. "People save each other all the time in the mafia, right?" Surely they must or no one would still be alive.

"Of course." Reborn polished a very large barrel. "And by doing so they incur a debt. It’s a special relationship. Between enemies, it’s a debt of honor that must be discharged. Within the Family it’s an extra bond of loyalty."

Tsuna took one second to consider the idea of Xanxus finding himself with a "special relationship" to Tsuna and started hyperventilating.

He’d never make it home alive.


Tsuna watched the fighting flow slowly over the slopes below and listened to the babble of voices in his earpiece and waited in the Flame’s stillness to see another opening to push the intruders back.

"They’re staying together, this is our best chance…"

"…shield, though, even Xanxus’ guns can’t get all the way through it."

"We need to get rid of it, then."

Tsuna watched the wavering opacity around the invaders flowing and reforming, and felt the weight of it in his mind and senses, and nodded. In the present stillness of his mind, he knew there would only be more deaths if he held his hand now. "I can do it," he said, the first he’d spoken during this battle.

There was silence on the earpiece for a moment until the Ninth said, "Reborn?"

"He’s my student, of course he can." A double crack of gunfire rang out off to the left and through the earpiece, and another of the invaders went down. "It’s line of sight, though, and he’ll need cover to prepare it. Twenty seconds."

Babble broke out again.

"…take the whole thing out he’ll be up pretty high."

"Wide field of fire…"

"…Varia can do it?"

Unthought calculation tumbled through the back of Tsuna’s mind. The Varia probably could protect him, if they chose to really do it. If they didn’t, could he protect himself? Their "failure" would have to be subtle, before so many witnesses, so, probably, yes.

Xanxus snarled an acknowledgment over the line and Tsuna nodded to himself. "Fifteen minutes for the squad on the east to be in position," he stated, the movement he had watched coming together into prediction. "I’ll be one hundred feet up from the first terrace."

There was another hitch of quiet and then a rattle of movement orders to the eastern defenders. Tsuna made his way up the terraces and found Squalo there ahead of him, bellowing for the other Varia to hurry up or he wouldn’t leave anything for them.

Tsuna would have prefered his own Guardians around him, for this, but it had been his own choice for them to stay behind. He would just have to keep his eyes open. He nodded to the Varia.

"Now."

A hundred feet up the stone wall, Tsuna had the angle he needed to strike the invaders’ shield and he was completely exposed. Knives, illusion, lighting flickered around him as he drew on the Flame and started to focus it. His eyes didn’t leave his target, and so he saw it coming for him, larger than any bullet he’d seen before and rippling the same way the shield was. It tracked him perfectly and the world slowed and sharpened as he decided it would probably follow him even if he moved; he hadn’t built enough power yet to deflect it; his senses reached out, searching for the best answer.

And then Xanxus was in front of him, firing into the oncoming danger, firing and not moving. Surprise flickered in Tsuna’s thoughts, but the calm of the Dying Will drew memory together into understanding, and Tsuna knew what Xanxus was doing.

Discharging his obligation. Declaring his enmity.

So be it. Tsuna concentrated again on raising his Flame, even as the bullet and whatever it carried struck Xanxus and he fell. As Xanxus fell, Tsuna raised his hand and released the Flame.

He breathed once, twice, watching as it struck the shield and spread, breathed deeper and focused the Flame more tightly, ignoring the rise of voices in his earpiece. He felt the break before he saw it, the sudden give under the force of his attack. The shield didn’t crack, but it gave. And then it disintegrated.

Everything paused for one moment, and then a roar swept over the field, triumph and terror mixed together.

Tsuna was more than happy to leave firing on people caught in the open with no cover to others, and instead he descended the wall to where Squalo had dragged Xanxus around a corner into a bit of shelter from stray bullets. The other Varia had already scattered, having, Tsuna knew well enough, none of his reluctance.

Xanxus bared his teeth, looking up at Tsuna from where he leaned against the wall with a certain satisfaction laid over the constant fury in his eyes. It didn’t waver as Squalo yanked bandages tight around his shoulder.

"There, damn idiot," Squalo declared and turned to bound toward the battle.

Xanxus ignored him, snarling that backhanded triumph at Tsuna, and Tsuna came closer and knelt beside him. He hadn’t seen Xanxus in a long time, and maybe Reborn was right about his intuition growing, because this time he understood something he hadn’t before. He lifted a burning hand and laid it against the center of Xanxus’ chest.

"There shouldn’t be ice here."

Now Xanxus was staring at him, blank and furious instead of pleased and furious, not even bothering to brush him away. "The hell?"

It wasn’t something seen. It wasn’t something felt. But Tsuna knew what was under his hand. "Your Will has frozen your heart." He frowned and flattened his palm. "It shouldn’t be like that."

It would be such a small thing to do, really. He reached with his own Will, and Xanxus jerked back against the wall behind him, eyes widening. "No…"

Tsuna looked up at him. "I know." He knew the first crack in that ice, and the fractured edges of it. He knew how they would cut when they came free. Love and betrayal both slid off the ice, right now, and Tsuna knew that they shouldn’t.

The fury and terror in Xanxus’ eyes only knew the agony waiting in those edges, though, and that he had been checkmated before he knew it. Tsuna’s hand had already closed around the rage the fueled his Will.

"No!" Xanxus’ voice was harsh and tight and almost inaudible, his whole body rigid under Tsuna’s hand, fingers closed helplessly hard on the chips of broken stone under them.

Tsuna listened to the sounds coming from below them, to the death following his actions, and finally sighed and reluctantly drew his hand back, releasing the unseen ice from his Will. He stood, head bowed, looking down at Xanxus staring up at him. He almost certainly was risking his life, to refrain, and he didn’t know if he was truly doing any good for Xanxus either. But Xanxus had chosen that ice and Tsuna couldn’t undo it by force.

He turned away into the building and left Xanxus staring after him, breathing hard.


Tsuna sat in his chair and tried not to fidget, because sometimes now it made someone jump when he did. He didn’t really think that was much of an improvement over the past few months, but Reborn smiled a lot.

The Ninth leaned back in his chair, smiling. "Well, that’s one conflict cleared up in Vongola favor. So let’s move on to other business. Does anyone still have any objections to my successor?"

Tsuna froze, wide-eyed, as the entire table looked at him. Murmurs and headshakes and a few smiles ran around the gathering, and Tsuna wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or even more alarmed that they were accepting him.

He hadn’t even accepted him, yet!

Well… not exactly.

And then everyone stilled, eyes turning to Xanxus, who was glaring wild and hard at Tsuna once again and hadn’t said a thing.

Tsuna bit his lip and looked back. He remembered tremors raking Xanxus’ chest under his palm. Would it help if he apologized?

And just as Tsuna was opening his mouth, hand raised toward Xanxus, groping for words, Xanxus flinched back and lowered his eyes.

The whole room breathed again.

"Good," the Ninth said quietly. "Then I think we’re done here."

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Dec 02, 08
Name (optional):
xantissa, Bakageta, Lys ap Adin (lysapadin) and 7 other readers sent Plaudits.

Breaking of the Day – Omake

Because I really couldn’t resist. Toward the end of Tsuna’s investiture as the Tenth Boss, Xanxus puts in an appearance. Humor, I-2

Tsuna had thought he could relax, that all the Vongola leaders and allies that were coming had come, had been dealt with, that any potential embarrassment at being acclaimed The Tenth Boss was behind him for now.

And then Xanxus stalked through the door.

Gokudera and Yamamoto both tensed up, behind him, and Tsuna wasn’t entirely sure they were wrong to do so.

Xanxus stopped in the middle of the room, feet spread, and glared at him. "I hate your fucking guts," he declared.

Tsuna considered this blunt, frontal statement of the obvious for a moment and relaxed. "I know," he agreed, quietly.

"Good." Xanxus strode the rest of the way across the room, ignoring Gokudera’s chopped off shout, to seize Tsuna’s wrist. Tsuna waved frantic calming gestures, dangling half out of his seat as Xanxus pulled his arm up.

And kissed his hand.

Dead silence rippled out through the room, in which Tsuna’s small oof as Xanxus dropped him again sounded clearly.

Xanxus was still glaring down at him. "Just remember it."

"I will," Tsuna managed, catching his breath.

Xanxus snorted and spun around, stalking back out.

"Congratulations?" Yamamoto ventured, at last.

Tsuna laughed helplessly.

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Dec 02, 08
Name (optional):
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A Question for Dusk

Takes place just before Breaking of the Day: Omake. As Tsuna prepares to inherit the family, he comes to Xanxus with a condition. Drama, I-4

Character(s): Sawada Tsunayoshi, Xanxus

Tsuna stood in the doorway, one hand on the sill. He didn’t want to intrude.

"I need to ask you something."

The long, lean figure slouched in one of the scatter of leather chairs snorted and burning eyes flashed in the dimness as Xanxus looked up.

"Do you plan on staying with the Vongola family?"

The hot eyes narrowed on him. "The hell are you saying?"

Tsuna shrugged. "I wouldn’t be surprised if you wanted to break off and start your own or something."

Another snort and Xanxus leaned back. "You’re a fucking idiot. You have no clue how things really work."

A corner of Tsuna’s mouth twitched up, despite how tense he felt. "I know. I’m working on it. So you plan to stay?"

Xanxus ignored him with such obvious disgust that Tsuna decided it was a yes. He took a breath.

"Okay. There’s a condition for that."

He bit down a flinch as Xanxus erupted to his feet.

"The hell are you saying?!" It was a lot louder this time. Xanxus faced him, sneering, hands out from his sides in a way that made Tsuna keep half an eye on them. "You want me to grovel for you, for everyone to see?"

"No." Tsuna made himself keep his eyes on Xanxus’. "I don’t want you to grovel. You don’t even need to acknowledge me." He breathed out a tense half-laugh as Xanxus settled back onto his heels. "You don’t even need to do what I ask you to."

Thought was coming back into that burning glare, and suspicion. "Yeah? You’ll just sit there and let me tell you to fuck off, huh? Tenth." Contempt dripped from the title.

"If you want," Tsuna said quietly.

Xanxus threw back his head and laughed. "Sounds like a deal to me! So what the hell is this condition?"

Tsuna braced himself. "You don’t have to do what I tell you. But when I tell you not to do something, that’s different."

Xanxus stilled, glare slowly turning hot again. "You little shit…"

Tsuna told his knees sternly not to shake and spent a second wishing he could have done this with his Will burning. But that wouldn’t have gotten him what he needed, here. "That’s my only condition."

Xanxus looked at him for a long moment before swinging away to stare out one of the tall windows. Tsuna waited quietly, hand tense against the frame of the door as seconds ticked past and past.

"All right." Xanxus’ voice was flat and his back stiff.

Tsuna took another breath. One more step. "May I have your word?"

Xanxus half whirled, snarling over his shoulder, and Tsuna tensed another notch, poised to drive himself down into Dying Will if this was the last straw and Xanxus attacked him. But Xanxus froze as his eyes met Tsuna’s, hand opening and closing by his side as he stared at him. The hot glare wavered and finally he spun back around and punched the wall, leaving a crater of shattered plaster.

"You have my word." It was low and harsh.

Tsuna swallowed. "Thank you," he managed, a little husky himself, and stepped back from Xanxus’ door.

He didn’t turn his back until he was around the corner, though.

End

Last Modified: Dec 06, 08
Posted: Dec 06, 08
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The Nature of You

As Tsuna grows into his position, his conflicts with Xanxus escalate again and finally break. Drama, I-4, some spoilers

One Hand

Tsuna sat at an oval table with the advisors and lieutenants so newly inherited and tried to feel leader-like. It still wasn’t easy.

"We should erase the members of Gesso now, before they grow too strong again," Savio argued.

Tsuna tried not to sigh as murmurs of agreement ran around the table, and tried again. "They won’t become Gesso, now."

"They’re still dangerous."

Unfortunately, Tsuna couldn’t argue with that. Gokudera eyed him for a moment and turned to the table. "Think about what we are. Most of us, and our allies, are dangerous. If we start a war on that basis, where will it end?"

That finally made everyone pause and Tsuna gave Gokudera a grateful look. It made Gokudera glow just a bit, and that made Tsuna smile, and everything looked a little better.

"Keh!" Xanxus flung himself deeper into his chair, one arm slung over the back, and glared out a window. "Bunch of bullshit. Kill them now and be sure."

The murmurs swung back toward agreement again and this time Tsuna did sigh. And tried to ignore Xanxus’ slight, vicious smile.

He’d known this wasn’t going to be easy.

Other Hand

Tsuna looked up, anxious, as Yamamoto came in. "How is De Vecchi?"

Yamamoto smiled, reassuring. "The doctors say he’ll be fine." The smile faded a little. "It will probably take a month or two, though."

The room exploded into response.

"It’s an insult!"

"…can’t believe they rejected our offer to negotiate, who do they think they are?!"

"…nearly killed our envoy!"

"We can’t let this go!"

"It won’t happen twice." That was Xanxus, and the room fell silent as he stood with a tiny smile. "The Varia will avenge our name."

"Wait." Tsuna folded his hands tightly as Xanxus swung around to glare at him.

"What?!"

"I said wait." Tsuna took a slow breath. "There must be a reason they reacted that way. I don’t want to turn this into some kind of war between us and the Pozzo Nero. Not without at least trying again."

Xanxus snarled. "They’ve already declared where they stand! If we back down now every other Family will think we’re weak and attack us! This has to be answered. Now!"

"No," Tsuna said quietly, and looked up to meet Xanxus’ eyes, which widened.

They held each other for two long breaths as the room stilled around them. A muscle jumped in Xanxus’ jaw.

And then he spun around, slamming his chair out of the way, and stormed out of the room.

"Why that…!" Gokudera started up from his own chair.

Tsuna laid a hand on his arm. "Don’t. It’s all right."

Gokudera frowned. "Tenth."

Tsuna smiled up at him, a little sad, and repeated, "It’s all right. He won’t go."

Gokudera’s look turned thoughtful and he nodded, slowly. "If you say so, boss." He sat down again. Tsuna gathered himself, and turned back to the frowns and sidelong looks of the rest of the Vongola, grateful for Gokudera beside him, and Yamamoto standing behind his shoulder.

"I’ll ask Hibari if he’s willing to see them." Tsuna’s mouth quirked at the suddenly lighter expressions around the room and he tried not to listen to the faint, distant crashes from Xanxus’ wing of the building.

Clapping

Tsuna sat and listened to his people arguing and felt his stomach sinking.

Xanxus was being too quiet.

And it wasn’t the glowering quiet he used when he disagreed and wanted to make damn sure everyone knew he did. Today he just leaned back in his seat, watching everyone else from under half lowered lids.

Tsuna had really hoped it wouldn’t come to this.

Finally he laid his hands flat on the table and leaned forward. "We will not absorb the Scioneri by force," he stated.

"But they’re operating in our territory!" Viotti protested vigorously. "You have to do something, boss! You’ll look weak if you don’t."

"If we have to drive them out, we will," Tsuna said softly, looking down at his hands. "But I will not have anyone forced into my Family who doesn’t choose to be here, with us."

That soothed the murmurs and he could see everyone settling, a few even smiling.

Xanxus’ expression didn’t flicker, and Tsuna’s mouth tightened. He had a bad feeling that, as long as Xanxus stuck to the letter of their agreement and didn’t cross a direct order, the rest of the Vongola would be pleased enough that he’d eliminated a problem to keep Tsuna from doing anything about it. And it would just get worse from there.

He could give a direct order now, and head it off for today, but he had an equally bad feeling that doing so wouldn’t stop the fresh confrontation they were headed for. His hands tightened as he considered what a real resolution might require.

"Gokudera," he murmured as the meeting broke up, "tell everyone. There’s probably going to be a… disturbance, tonight. Don’t come. I’ll handle it myself."

Gokudera looked disapproving. "If there’s something going on, your Family should know about it." Tsuna smiled up at him.

"I know, it’s just…" He sighed. "I need to do this myself. Please."

Gokudera’s shoulders fell a little. "I hate it when you do that," he muttered. He sighed in turn and bent his head. "We won’t interfere."

The unspoken unless something goes wrong hung in the air so loudly Tsuna laughed a little, and felt better.

True to Gokudera’s word, though, there were no bodyguards and no look-outs around as Tsuna paced through the halls that night and out the South doors to wait in the darkness.

When Xanxus came through the door, Squalo and Bel and Levi already with him, Tsuna stepped forward. "Xanxus."

The smile on Xanxus’ face turned instantly to a snarl. "You!"

Holding on to a last shred of hope, Tsuna kept his hands at his sides. "I do not want the Scioneri boss killed."

Xanxus sneered. "Of course you don’t. You’re too soft to do what will keep the Vongola strong."

"The strength of our Family doesn’t come from our guns!"

Xanxus stared at him for a long moment. Finally he spat, deliberately, at Tsuna’s feet. "You’re a disgrace to the Vongola. A disgrace to manhood! Too soft to hold my word or this Family, either one of them! Get out of my way."

"No," Tsuna said, quietly.

His hands were already burning as Xanxus’ dove for his guns.

Xanxus lips were pulled back over his teeth as he fired, and the Flames that seared toward Tsuna burned with hate, ripped apart the air and reached for his blood. He didn’t want to touch them, didn’t dare risk absorbing them, so he wove through them instead, sharpening his awareness of Xanxus and giving aside from each furious blow.

He prayed Gokudera would do as he said and keep everyone away. The Varia who were present had retreated already, knowing full well the risk of being anywhere near Xanxus’ rage.

And pain.

The desperate force that drove Xanxus’ bolts of Flame through the dark made Tsuna’s chest tight. He had made a mistake, years ago, leaving Xanxus like this. Now he had to amend it as best he could. The memory of Xanxus’ expression under his hand, years ago, feral with fear, made him hang back, hesitating. The scream of Xanxus’ Flame through the air was what finally drove him forward; he didn’t want to cause pain, but still less did he want to leave someone slashed and broken and bleeding out.

And not even knowing that was what was happening.

The closer he came, the brighter fear rekindled in Xanxus’ eyes, crowding the rage. Neither could completely hide the pain that had driven Xanxus out the doors tonight, and Tsuna wished he could say something to help.

But that would only come later.

He twisted aside from the last wild shot and ran full into Xanxus, knocking him back against the outer wall, and pressed a burning hand to his chest.

"No!"

The shriek twisted Tsuna’s own heart, but this time he didn’t stop. He closed his Will around Xanxus’ heart and let it burn, purify, melting free the razor edges of regret and want and despair. Xanxus screamed again, spine arched, heart hammering under Tsuna’s palm, and Tsuna clenched his teeth. Need and betrayal and wild rage spun free as he drove his Flame inward, and Xanxus’ voice stripped hoarse and wordless as Tsuna broke his Will until the last of the ice was wrung from his soul and melted into that river of pain.

Tsuna could only think it merciful for both of them when Xanxus slumped into unconsciousness, falling against him.

He knelt by the wall, breathing hard, arms around Xanxus to keep him from falling to the cold grass. He was shaking, clinging to the knowledge that this was the only way to let that pain flow away even as Xanxus’ scream echoed in his ears. Footsteps rustled behind him and he looked up to see Squalo and Gokudera both approaching, the one with teeth bared in fury and the other very pale.

"Squalo," he murmured, weary. "Take Xanxus back to his rooms. He’ll sleep for a while."

"What did you do to him?" Squalo hissed, apparently too infuriated even to shout.

"What I should have done a long time ago, if I’d had the courage to make both of us bear it." Tsuna’s voice was clipped, and he closed his eyes for a moment. "I’ll come see him soon."

Squalo growled and pulled Xanxus roughly away from him, calling for Levi to help him carry their leader back inside. Tsuna leaned against the smooth, old stone, watching them go and finally released his Will. Exhaustion hit him like a hammer. A warm hand on his shoulder made him start a little.

"Come on, boss," Gokudera said, gently. "Let’s get you inside, too."

Tsuna leaned on him gratefully.

Gokudera glared everyone out of the way as he guided Tsuna up to his own room, pausing only to exchange meaningful nods with Yamamoto who was still busy calming the bodyguards. Tsuna sighed as the door closed behind him, steadying himself on one of the armchairs.

"I didn’t want to."

Gokudera was quiet for a moment. "If you didn’t want to and you did it anyway, that means it was something that really needed to be done," he finally said.

"I know," Tsuna whispered.

It just didn’t help much.

Make a Fist

Squalo stood between Tsuna and the door, glare sharper than his sword, and his voice echoed off the high ceiling. "Like hell I’m letting you at him again! You’re the one who did this to him!"

Tsuna rubbed his eyes with one hand. "Yes, exactly."

Squalo snarled and it was Tsuna’s turn to glare. "He’s part of my Family! That was the choice he made! And if I’m not going to let him slaughter people just for breathing wrong, I’m also not going to leave him like this!"

Squalo’s eyes narrowed, suddenly thoughtful. "What do you think you can do?"

"I don’t know," Tsuna said, quietly. "But it’s my responsibility to do whatever I can."

Squalo’s gaze rested on him for a long moment before he finally stepped aside. Though not very far aside, Tsuna noted wryly. He eased past and tapped on the door.

There was no answer.

The room was dim when Tsuna opened the door, all the curtains drawn and lit from behind with morning sun, and Tsuna’s first thought was Den. The den a wounded animal crawled back to. "Xanxus?" he called, softly.

One of the chairs went over with a clatter as Xanxus surged up out of it, and Tsuna winced at the wildness of his eyes.

"Stay away!"

"I will." Tsuna stood where he was. Even from here he could see Xanxus’ hands shaking.

"What are you doing here?"

Tsuna sighed. "I’m trying to help." The harsh burst of laughter that answered that made his mouth tighten. But he couldn’t let either of them stop here. "You need to let it go," he said, low.

"Let what go?" There was an alarming lilt in Xanxus’ voice, now, and his lips pulled back off his teeth. "My life? My blood? Why not? It’s not Vongola, after all! Not like yours. Happy you’ve proved it on me?"

"That’s not what I’m talking about," Tsuna said, and couldn’t help adding, "And so what, anyway?" He composed himself again as Xanxus stared at him. "I’m talking about the pain. If you freeze it, well maybe you don’t feel it as much, but it stays with you until the end of time. You can’t keep going like this."

"If I don’t feel it, so what?" Xanxus swung around and made for a side table, and a scatter of bottles, most empty. Finding one that wasn’t, he sloshed it into a tumbler and tossed it back in three swallows.

"I said ‘as much’." Tsuna frowned at the array of bottles; he’d been afraid of something like that. "If you really didn’t feel it, you wouldn’t be looking for things to stifle it with."

"What the hell are you babbling about?" Xanxus voice wasn’t slurred at all, and Tsuna wasn’t sure whether that was good or not.

"Your position," he said, quietly. "Leader of the Family. Leader of the Varia. Did you really think enough voices calling you ‘Tenth’ would drown out the old ones calling you trash?"

He didn’t move as the tumbler shattered against the wall behind his head.

"Voices that are only afraid of you aren’t the ones you need. They’ll only make the old voices louder in the end."

"What the hell do you know about it?" Xanxus had his back to Tsuna, and his voice was ragged.

"Even with our intuition, we can’t see ourselves very well, can we?" Tsuna murmured. "We have to do that for each other."

"Get out!"

Tsuna bowed his head with a sigh and slipped out.

As he closed the door behind him a bared sword winked from where Squalo leaned against the wall. Tsuna’s lips twitched; Xanxus didn’t really have far to go to find the kind of voice he did need, if he’d only listen. "I think," he said calmly, "I’m going to need heavier guns for this. See if you can keep him from drinking quite so much while I get them." He turned away down the hall.

Yamamoto emerged from the shadow of the other wall to fall in beside him, hand sliding away from his own sword, and nodded amiably at Squalo, who growled back at him. "So? How did it go?"

"I think I need to call home."

Yamamoto smiled down at him, confident and comfortable. "Knew you’d be able to fix it."

Tsuna snorted, rueful. "Well, kind of."

Yamamoto didn’t leave his side until he’d seen Tsuna into his rooms, and then he only leaned against the wall beside the door. His Family’s support was the only reason he could deal with this job at all, Tsuna swore, dialing.

"Tsuna?" His dad yawned hugely and Tsuna held the phone away from his ear with a wry grin. "What’s up?"

"I need to speak to the Ninth." Tsuna waited out the resulting silence.

"I’m not going to let him stress himself too much," his dad finally said, quiet. "He’s getting… fragile."

"I understand."

There was some rustling and his dad’s muffled shout of, "It’s for you!"

"Yes?"

Tsuna bit his lip at the raspiness of the Ninth’s voice. "Sir. I… I’m afraid I need to ask a favor."

A chuckle. "Well, I’m retired of course…"

Tsuna laughed a little. "It isn’t like that. It’s… Well, it’s for Xanxus."

Another long moment of silence.

"Tell me."

Open Palm

"I really hate these contraptions," the Ninth grumbled.

"Dad made me promise," Tsuna said firmly, steering the wheelchair carefully down the hall.

"Yes, yes, I’m sure he did." The Ninth was quiet for a moment and finally sighed. "You’re a wiser man than I am." He snorted softly. "And stronger, too, which probably helps."

"Not always," Tsuna murmured.

"Mm." The Ninth lifted a hand to pat Tsuna’s. "I understand."

Tsuna stopped them by Xanxus’ door and helped the Ninth to stand. Once again, his knock got no answer at all and he sighed.

The Ninth made an amused sound. "He never answers. Even when he’s in a good mood. You just have to take your chances." He stepped forward, cane thumping heavily, and pushed open the door.

"What the hell do—"

Lingering as unobtrusively as he could manage, in the doorway, Tsuna saw Xanxus freeze, eyes widening.

"You."

The room smelled strongly of alcohol and was littered with broken glass. Tsuna assumed this was the aftermath of Squalo following his advice and made a mental note to thank him. The Ninth shook his head, gaze never leaving Xanxus.

"Oh, my boy," he sighed. "You stepped right in it this time, didn’t you?"

Xanxus jerked in his chair and pulled in a breath through bared teeth, only to be cut short as the Ninth thumped his way across the room and closed an arm around Xanxus’ shoulders.

"And so what? You’re my son," he stated firmly. "Whatever mess you’ve made of your life, and you’ve made a damn great mess, doesn’t change that." Under the moustache his mouth twitched into a grin. "In fact, I think helping untangle damn great messes is one of the things fathers are for."

Tsuna saw a shudder ripple through Xanxus, and saw the Ninth’s gnarled hand tighten on his shoulder, and smiled.

He tiptoed out and closed the door very, very quietly.

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Jan 19, 09
Name (optional):
xantissa, Bakageta, Lys ap Adin (lysapadin) and 13 other readers sent Plaudits.

What’s Love Got to Do With It

The Ninth helps Xanxus find someone he can bear to be. Drama with Angst and Fluff, I-3

It wasn’t that Tsuna didn’t trust the Ninth, because of course he did. And it wasn’t that he didn’t think the Ninth could handle Xanxus, even, or especially, now, because he did, really. It was just… well, his dad had made him solemnly swear he’d make sure the Ninth didn’t overstrain himself.

And that was really the only reason Tsuna kept just happening to pass Xanxus’ rooms or the balcony beyond them to check on them every couple days.

His excuses hadn’t even convinced himself yet, and he doubted he’d convince either of them, so he tip-toed.


"…didn’t you just tell me?" Xanxus’ voice was stifled and he was leaning, hands clenched, on the back of an armchair. "Why’d you let me keep thinking I was your kid, all that time?"

The Ninth sighed. "Because I didn’t think it would matter."

Xanxus shoulders twitched and Tsuna held his breath.

"It seemed obvious you had to have Vongola blood from somewhere, even if it wasn’t mine," the Ninth said, softly. "Your Flame was all the proof anyone needed of that. And who cared how far back it came from? Look at Tsunayoshi, after all!" He was silent for a long moment before adding, "And I wanted another son. I thought… if I raised you, if I loved you, if I was the father you knew… wasn’t that good enough?"

Xanxus didn’t answer and Tsuna had to swallow the tightness in his throat as he slipped away.


"It doesn’t make sense!"

Xanxus was pacing the balcony today, so Tsuna only eased up to the nearest open window.

"How can he be so damn soft and still do something like this to me?!"

The Ninth actually laughed. "Oh, Xanxus. It’s the gentle ones who are most dangerous of all."

Xanxus rounded on his father. "You want to explain that?"

Tsuna caught a glimpse of the Ninth’s smile. "Tsunayoshi is a gentle soul, yes. He cares very much for people. And that," he rapped his cane on the flagstones, "that is the source of his strength. When the things he cares for are threatened, there will be no end to his determination and no bottom to the well of his strength." More softly, "And that is why I chose him, be damned to his bloodline."

"Because he’s stronger," Xanxus said, after a moment.

"Because of the times and the reasons he becomes stronger," the Ninth corrected, gently.

Xanxus grunted, which might be agreement or might be confusion, Tsuna didn’t know. He did know he was blushing as he edged back down the hall.


"It’s gone."

Tsuna stopped short, hearing the granite roughness in Xanxus’ voice.

"You’re still alive and breathing, so I doubt it’s really gone," the Ninth said, voice gentle.

Tsuna slipped up to peek out onto the terrace. Xanxus was hunched over, leaning on the rail and the Ninth stood beside him, one hand on his back.

"I’ve tried," Xanxus growled, raggedly. "I’ve tried over and over and nothing happens!"

The Ninth looked at his son thoughtfully. "Xanxus. Tell me. The people you knew, as a child. How do you feel about them, now?"

Tsuna saw a little of Xanxus’ sudden snarl, even from his angle.

"Those fucking bastards. I hate them. I want to crush them all!" One hand fisted and light flashed between his fingers.

Xanxus jerked upright, and it winked out.

"What the…?"

The Ninth smiled. "I thought so. It isn’t gone, my boy."

Xanxus turned, frowning. "But every time I tried…"

The Ninth snorted into his moustache. "You didn’t try it with a target who truly deserved your anger, did you?" His voice gentled as he patted Xanxus’ shoulder. "Tsunayoshi freed your intuition and showed you the truth, didn’t he? That those people aren’t the whole world. Hard to unknow that, now; of course it affects your Flame."

"Wish he’d minded his own goddamn business," Xanxus grumbled, though it was half-hearted and distracted as he stared at his own hand.

"I don’t." The Ninth smiled up at him. "Because now I have my son back. And he can hear me when I say I love him, this time."

Xanxus looked up at that, a sudden tangle of pain and doubt and hesitant want sweeping over his face.

Tsuna tip-toed away, feeling really hopeful for the first time.


"…and I could have destroyed all of the Family’s enemies." Xanxus was pacing again, restless.

"The boss needs to be powerful, yes, and able to protect the Family." The Ninth sipped from his wineglass and set it down on the balcony’s table, eyes following his son. "But, as you were then, I’m afraid I doubted you would bother to protect instead of simply destroy."

"It’s better to be sure," Xanxus growled. "Better to obliterate your enemies than leave them alive to try again."

"And would even that have made you feel safe?" the Ninth asked, quietly.

Xanxus stopped abruptly and stood still, face turned away.

"A boss’ job is to make all his Family safe." The Ninth looked down at his hands. "In that, I failed you. I’m glad Tsunayoshi retrieved my mistake, but… I can’t blame you if you find it hard to trust."

After a long moment Xanxus said, voice low, "I never really tried it."

Tsuna’s heart cracked at the wryness of the Ninth’s smile and the shadow of hope in it, and at how young Xanxus’ eyes looked when he turned his head and stared at his father.

"What keeps you safe?" he asked, at last.

The Ninth’s smile widened, and he opened his hand, gesturing at the mansion behind them. "Having people who love you near is the safest thing I’ve ever found."

Xanxus frowned. "Huh."

Tsuna firmly stifled an urge to bang his head against the wall with frustration. They’d hear him if he did.


"…a very simple young man, really," the Ninth was saying as Tsuna sidled up to the balcony door. "He acts because he cares. Once you know that, it’s easy to predict what he’ll do."

Xanxus snorted, leaning his hips against the rail. "Except for the times he acts on idiot moral outrage, or whatever the hell that was."

"Tsunayoshi would never have set his hand on you if he didn’t believe in his heart that you’re one of his Family, and worthy of his care," the Ninth said quietly.

Tsuna expected the kind of scoffing Xanxus had always met the least such suggestion with, but Xanxus was silent.

"I don’t get how he can," he said at last, staring out over the hills. "I tried to kill him, for fuck’s sake."

The Ninth snorted into his moustache. "So did his Mist Guardian, didn’t he? And look how that’s ended up."

An unwilling grin tugged at Xanxus’ mouth.

"I’ve seen Tsunayoshi arguing with the Vendicare themselves on Rokudou Mukurou’s behalf. He’s done his best to heal the man, and to give him both freedom and a home. It seems," the Ninth glanced up at Xanxus from under bushy brows, "to be a bit of a habit with him."

Xanxus crossed arms tightened and he looked back at the Ninth, eyes dark.

The Ninth smiled. "He protects his people. Remember that, and it will all make sense."

Tsuna slipped away, biting his lip. He felt positive the Ninth was being more generous than he deserved.


"I… I didn’t… when you let me go… why… " Xanxus’ words were soft and stumbling, and Tsuna wondered for a moment if he was drunk or drugged. He’d never heard Xanxus sound like that before.

"I hoped," the Ninth said, just as soft. "It may have been foolish of me, but I hoped that, with my successor named, we could set aside all of that and try again to just be father and son." He sighed. "I suppose that was pretty insensitive of me, all things considered. I’m sorry."

"It… wasn’t your fault."

Peeking out, Tsuna saw that the Ninth had Xanxus’ hands in his and Xanxus wasn’t pulling away, though he looked at a loss over what else he should do.

"You are my son," the Ninth said, firmly. "I have always been here for you. I always will be." More softly, he added, "I couldn’t just leave you like that."

Xanxus looked up at the old man standing in front of him and, slowly, nodded. "Okay." His voice was rough and husky, and even without reaching for the Flame Tsuna could perceive the fear tightening his shoulders. But his hands wrapped around the Ninth’s in turn.

Tsuna edged quickly back down the hall, far enough to drag out his handkerchief and wipe his eyes and blow his nose and walk back toward his office grinning like an idiot.


"You sound like being the boss and being a dad are the same thing, half the time."

The Ninth chuckled. "Well, there’s a reason we call it a Family, after all."

Xanxus blinked as if that had never occurred to him, and, lurking in the hall, Tsuna did too. He certainly never felt like a father, dealing with his Family.

A babysitter, maybe.

From the sardonic twist to his mouth Xanxus might be thinking the same thing. "Might be just as well, then. Never wanted kids."

The Ninth’s eyes twinkled. "You’re sure you want to keep the Varia, then?"

Xanxus shrugged, looking a bit uncomfortable. The Ninth reached over and patted his arm. "Well, I’m sure you’ve gotten used to them by now," he said gently.

Xanxus looked at his hands, frowning, more thoughtful than angry for once. "Maybe."


After weeks of trying very hard not to intrude on Xanxus and the Ninth, or at least trying very hard not to be caught, and of sternly forbidding anyone else to eavesdrop either, Tsuna was extremely startled to find Xanxus waiting for him, in the shadows of his office.

"Xanxus," he greeted the man’s reemergence.

Xanxus watched him silently for a long moment before looking down at his own crossed arms. "Sawada."

Tsuna waited, encouraged by the lack of immediate hostility.

"You haven’t yet, but. If you did send the Varia out." Xanxus paused for a long moment, not looking up. "What kind of people would you aim us for?"

Tsuna was quiet for a long moment. "I can only imagine sending you after someone crazy. Someone I hadn’t been able to talk to. Someone who was killing our people, or-" he remembered the future that hadn’t happened, "-destroying our world. Someone I couldn’t find any other way of stopping." He spread his hands. That was the truth as clearly as he could give it, and he waited to see what Xanxus would do with it.

"Mm. Could probably do that."

Tsuna’s mouth quirked at the grudging tone and then he straightened as he recalled what the Ninth had said to Xanxus about targets that deserved his anger. Was Xanxus actually afraid he couldn’t do the job he’d chosen any longer?

"I’ve been thinking, though," he essayed, by way of testing the idea, "since the Varia are more in the open now, anyway, maybe there’s call for your abilities outside of assassinations."

Xanxus gave him a hard look and Tsuna mentally nodded to himself.

"I mean, I need to get to people before I can talk to them, don’t I?" he added, ingenuously. "And the Varia are the very best at getting to people."

Xanxus snorted. "And then I’ll be right there to kill them when you completely flop," he drawled.

"I’d rather you not, but if it really does have to be done, then yes." Tsuna returned Xanxus’ look evenly and saw a flicker of respect. "Are you staying?" he finished, softly, offering that choice again.

Xanxus stilled for a long moment.

Finally he pushed away from the wall and stood, looking down at Tsuna, eyes dark. Tsuna felt like the entire world held its breath. When Xanxus spoke, his voice was clear and even.

"Yes."

End

Last Modified: Jan 20, 09
Posted: Jan 20, 09
Name (optional):
xantissa, Lys ap Adin (lysapadin), Bakageta and 16 other readers sent Plaudits.

I Said, You Said

Xanxus finally hears what Tsuna means when he says Xanxus is one of his Family. Drama with Fluff, I-3

Tsuna cast a quick eye over the parties pulled up to either side of the low table and stifled a sigh. Two houses alike in pigheadedness was how Gokudera put it, with a wry smile, and Tsuna could only agree.

Gamma was getting alarmingly affable, as he got to the end of his speech, too.

"So I’m sure you can see why our alliance feels a need to know how you knew that Genshiki was…" he paused, eyes turning hard over his friendly smile, "not of the same mind as the rest of us."

That was a delicate way to put "going to betray us". Tsuna laced his hands together and regarded them for a moment, fishing for the right words to start with. He didn’t think "well, you see, he did it in the future we went to over a decade ago" would quite work. He also didn’t know why Uni had left it to him to explain, when she knew the full story already—one of the few people in this new past-present who did. She was either being gracious, letting him decide what to reveal, or ruthless, forcing him to decide. With Uni it was hard to tell which sometimes.

The Girasol man stirred and leaned forward, frowning. "You have to see how suspicious this looks, when Vongola haven’t been able to deal permanently with a traitor in their own ranks." His eyes flicked to Xanxus, who had disdained a seat and was leaning against the wall instead.

Tsuna was aware of Xanxus slowly straightening, face dark, but only peripherally.

Most of his attention was taken up with the rush of fierce anger through his chest, the sharpening of his awareness and the first unfolding of his Flame.

"There are no traitors among the Vongola," he said, level as the edge of a razor and very soft, and the whole room froze around him. He didn’t take his eyes off the suddenly pale Girasol. "Xanxus is one of my Family, and it would not be wise for you to give me the idea you hold my Family in any contempt. At all."

"No, I… of course I didn’t mean…" the man stammered into silence and Tsuna inhaled slowly and looked back at Gamma.

"As for the rest of it, I suggest you talk to your own boss. It’s Uni’s place to decide what her Family should know, not mine."

"Hm." Gamma’s mouth twisted a bit, sardonic amusement and perhaps respect in the line of it. "True enough. All right, then."

There were some grumbles as he chivvied his delegation out the door, but not many, which was just as well. Tsuna silenced the more audible with a cold look after them. As the door closed he leaned back and made himself relax; it took a little while.

"Girasol is not on my Christmas card list this year," he announced, finally. Yamamoto laughed. Tsuna snorted and looked over at Xanxus. "You won’t …" he swallowed the do anything to them, right?, because Xanxus was still standing by the wall where he had straightened, staring at him in absolute confusion. "Xanxus?"

"Why did you do that?"

Tsuna blinked. "…do what?" He was aware of Gokudera choking down a laugh behind him but didn’t look away from Xanxus.

"That!" Xanxus waved at the closed door. "I’m not… you… why…" He finally slashed a hand through the air and turned away. "Never mind." He strode for the opposite door, pausing only once to glance back at Tsuna, uncertainty marking his face.

Gokudera leaned an elbow on the back of Tsuna’s chair and chuckled softly. "You sure have a way with people like that, boss."

Tsuna looked up at him, still faintly puzzled by Xanxus’ reaction. "Um?"

Gokudera smiled down at him, eyes soft. "Well, think about it from that poor idiot’s point of view. He starts out in the gutter. He didn’t belong and then he did, and then he got it totally knocked out from under him which must have been twice as bad… and just when he’s absolutely positive that he’s worthless and no one will ever give a damn about him, you defend him. In fact you threaten tentative allies for him." His smile tilted. "He’s probably still wondering if this is for real. When he decides it is…" He hesitated and turned a hand palm up. "Well, then we’ll see if you have another man everybody thought no one could tame."

Tsuna colored a little, a reaction he’d never grown out of. "Oh."

Yamamoto reached over and ruffled his hair, a gesture he’d never grown out of. "Don’t worry. He’ll come around."

Tsuna nodded slowly. He’d thought it was obvious that his strength was given to protect his Family, and Xanxus was part of that, but… given it was Xanxus maybe it needed a stronger demonstration.

"I can’t wait to see how it works out for him," Gokudera murmured as they left, mouth quirked.


Tsuna hadn’t exactly expected to enjoy dealing with the Pozzo Nero in person, but this was giving him a whole new definition of "not enjoying".

"I will not permit you to move drugs through our territory, or distribute them," he finally said, flatly, after two hours worth of less direct hints had failed.

"You’re not making use of any of that market yourselves," Grigio, the Pozzo Nero boss, said in a tone of strained reasonableness.

"That’s because I won’t have it here!" Tsuna snapped.

The man across from him sighed and sat back. "I see. I suppose I was afraid that might be your answer." His sudden calm made Tsuna tense. Grigio rose. "I’m sorry we couldn’t reach an agreement."

Tsuna was half expecting it when he stepped forward, hand darting under his jacket to pull a gun, and already had a hand up, Flame surging out, at Gokudera’s warning shout.

And then everything stopped, because Xanxus’ gun was pressed straight to Grigio’s forehead. His lips were pulled back in a hungry smile and his eyes had a feral glint. Tsuna was struck by the memory of another moment when Xanxus had shielded him, and spared a brief moment to hope the reasons were different this time.

As Tsuna eyed the slowly increasing tension of Xanxus’ finger on the trigger, he wondered if it wasn’t just that Xanxus had a good target in front of him at last.

"Hey…" Yamamoto started, light and easy, but Tsuna held up a hand. He didn’t think even Yamamoto’s good nature would defuse this. He thought about the spoken and unspoken promises he and Xanxus had made and took a slow breath.

"Thank you."

Xanxus started, eyes finally sliding away from his sweating target to blink at Tsuna. Tsuna smiled at him, and held his hand out. "Thank you," he said again, gently.

Xanxus stared at him for a long, blank moment before he finally glanced aside. "Yeah, fine, whatever." He flicked the barrel away from the Pozzo Nero and, before the man could straighten, slammed the butt into the side of his head instead. Grigio collapsed and Xanxus glared at the men who’d come with him, a hint of eagerness in his snarl. They all carefully took their hands out of their jackets. Xanxus snorted with disdain and stalked back to lean against the wall, arms crossed, watching them all with hooded eyes.

"You’re free to go," Tsuna told his visitors. "Do not," he added, voice turning cool, "come back."

They hustled their dazed boss out the door as quickly as Tsuna could have wished and he sat back with a sigh. He wanted a bath after that. He turned his head to give Xanxus another smile, this one weary. "Truly. Thank you."

Xanxus shrugged a shoulder, still not looking at him. "Hell, maybe they’ll come back, so I can kill them."

Tsuna’s mouth tightened, but… he had people to protect, here. "If they try," he agreed, quietly.

Xanxus pushed away from the wall and made for the door, only to pause with it half open and look back at Tsuna. He started to say something, stopped and shook his head. Finally he nodded to Tsuna, just a little, and strode out.

"He’s a tough nut to crack," Gokudera observed with a wry smile. "I’d have thought you’d have had him in hand by now."

"Oh, he is."

Tsuna blinked, because it was Yamamoto who had spoken, and he was watching the door Xanxus had gone through with a little quirk to his mouth.

Gokudera’s brows lifted. "You sure about that?"

"Oh yeah." Yamamoto looked back at them, smile back in place but distant. "Tsuna is his reason, now."

"You wanna translate that?" Gokudera drawled, arms crossed.

Yamamoto chuckled. "Well. Being good at something is… satisfying, you know? Sometimes you do what you’re good at just because of that. That’s how Xanxus used to be." He looked down at Tsuna, eyes dark. "But if there’s a bigger reason for fighting—to protect the Family, to serve you—then there’s real motivation. And real strength."

Tsuna looked up at him, knowing it wasn’t just Xanxus Yamamoto was talking about. "Yamamoto…"

"You’re such a sap sometimes," Gokudera put in, grinning.

"Hey, at least it’s only sometimes," Yamamoto shot back, looking innocent.

"You trying to say something?"

Tsuna smiled as they bantered, and tucked away the memory of the word Xanxus’ lips had half-formed, when he had turned back.

Boss.

End

Last Modified: Jan 21, 09
Posted: Jan 21, 09
Name (optional):
xantissa, Neraa, Bakageta, Lys ap Adin (lysapadin), Poogle and 15 other readers sent Plaudits.

It’s All a Metaphor

Remixed ending, a kind of AU to the rest of the arc. This is another way Tsuna and Xanxus might have come to their final understanding—a somewhat more dramatic one. Mind-Porn, I-4

Character(s): Sawada Tsunayoshi, Xanxus
Pairing(s): Tsuna/Xanxus

The door of Tsuna’s office was kicked open and Squalo stood in it, ignoring the weapons leveled at him.

"You!"

Tsuna regarded the finger pointed at him rather like a sword. "Yes?"

Squalo folded his arms. "You said you had a responsibility to him, after what you did."

You could always tell Squalo was serious when he stopped shouting, Tsuna reflected, and sighed as he stood up. "Where is he?"

"In his rooms." Squalo’s mouth twisted. "Better hurry if you don’t want him to break the goddamn wall this time."

"Thank you," Tsuna murmured with a sigh and went to see about Xanxus.


Squalo had almost understated the case, Tsuna decided, looking around the wreckage of Xanxus’ outer room. The walls weren’t broken but nearly everything else was, and Xanxus stood in the middle of it, chest heaving, eyes wild.

"Xanxus?" Tsuna asked, softly.

Xanxus whirled on him. "I can’t do it!"

"Can’t do what?" Tsuna edged cautiously into the room, closing the door behind him.

"I can’t fire on this goddamn Family! At anyone I know! The Flame won’t come!"

Tsuna firmly suppressed the urge to either roll his eyes or laugh helplessly. Xanxus, he reminded himself, had never been restrained by anything. "Most people find that they can’t fire at those they care for, who care for them, even with normal weapons."

Xanxus swept a hand across as if to strike away the words. "It’s always come! It’s always been there!"

Tsuna paused and looked harder at Xanxus. "The anger," he murmured, after a moment. It wasn’t exactly the Dying Will Flame Xanxus had never been without; it was his rage. The rage had been his weapon and his satisfaction, and now it was… well, not gone, but reduced. No wonder he was off balance.

Xanxus might not be in a good frame of mind to think about those underlying truths just at the moment, though. Perhaps it would be just as well for him to focus on the surface.

"If you can’t always fuel your Flame with anger," Tsuna said, matter of fact, "then you just need to master a different use of it. A different form, to use at other times."

Xanxus’ lip started to curl and then he abruptly stopped, gaze sharpening on Tsuna. Tsuna held his ground as Xanxus stalked towards him.

"Show me."

That made Tsuna blink. "Um?"

"Your Flame is strong enough." Xanxus took Tsuna’s wrist and pulled his hand up, placing it flat against his chest. "Show me, again."

Tsuna swallowed, trying to get his voice back from wherever shock had taken it. "Xanxus. I don’t know if…"

Xanxus eyes were burning, locked with Tsuna’s, and his words vibrated through his chest under Tsuna’s palm. "Show me."

Tsuna bit his lip. Squalo had been right; Tsuna had accepted his responsibility to Xanxus when he’d chosen to reach in and free his heart. He’d just never done something like this from a cold start, before. And certainly not by request. He took a deep breath and set his other hand on Xanxus’ shoulder. "All right."

It didn’t take long to find his Dying Will, but Tsuna let it light slowly, carefully, concentrating, not on burning or purifying, but on reaching out and touching, enfolding, encompassing Xanxus’ heart. A harsh gasp heaved the chest under his hand and he looked up.

Xanxus stood with his eyes half closed, head tossed back. Slowly, his hands came up to close on Tsuna’s arms. "More," he said, husky.

Tsuna looked up at him, measuringly. "You’re sure this is what you need?"

Xanxus swallowed, the taut arch of his throat working, and nodded.

"All right." Tsuna let the need of one of his Family call him, let his Will burn brighter, closing it around Xanxus’ heart or mind or soul, whatever it was of Xanxus that was under his hand.

Xanxus’ knees buckled and he folded down to the floor. Tsuna moved with him, unsurprised, settling between Xanxus’ knees, left hand firm and reassuring on his shoulder. Xanxus’ whole body was drawn taut, now, his breathing quick and hard.

"My friends, my family, those are the most important things, to me," Tsuna murmured to the man he held. "When I need it for them, it comes. As strong as it needs to be. Feel." He reached deeper, stronger, wanting Xanxus to know this.

Xanxus gasped and arched into Tsuna’s hand, panting now, breath cut short as the heat of Tsuna’s Will sank into him deep and slow, folded around him, offered to cherish him. His hands flexed on Tsuna’s arms, pulling him closer, and it was only because they were so close that Tsuna caught the whisper on his lips.

"…Tenth."

Tsuna couldn’t help the way his Will flared in response to that, not when he’d heard that tone before in Gokudera’s voice, and Xanxus groaned as it burned through him. Tsuna made himself stop; he shouldn’t go too far with this. He slid his left arm around Xanxus, holding him, palm pressed hard to his chest as Tsuna slowly eased his Will back. This close, he could feel the small shudders that worked through Xanxus as Tsuna released him, drew back until his Will was only just touching him. "Are you all right?" he murmured in Xanxus’ ear.

Xanxus didn’t answer, but his hand came up to press Tsuna’s against his chest.

Tsuna smiled, gently. "I’m not going away," he promised.

Xanxus growled at that interpretation, but didn’t let go. Tsuna knelt with him, patient. "The price of your old power is to hate," he said, softly. "The price of this power is to care. They can both hurt. You have to decide for yourself whether you can pay the price."

Xanxus nodded, after a moment, silently. Tsuna had the impression that he’d forgotten about the point of the exercise.

At least, the point when they’d started.

He pressed his Will out just a little and felt Xanxus’ breath catch. "I care for all my Family. Always."

A breath brushed past his ear, only the suggestion of the word boss in it.

Tsuna’s arm tightened and he smiled as he confirmed it.

"Always."

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Jan 22, 09
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