Bamboo, Pine and Peach: All In One

Ebook cover for the arc

Yukito loved Touya and broke Clow’s foreseeing. Now Yue, Touya, and Yukito have to find a way to live with each other, and hold on to love in face of Yue’s old fears. All these stories are based on the manga continuity, and therefore will contain manga spoilers. Touya/Yukito/Yue.

New Year in Winter

Takes place just after the Final Judgement. The Cards are happy; Yue isn’t, very. Drama with Angst, I-3

Character(s): Cards, Yue

The Cards were celebrating.

The blue dusk of their Place nearly sparkled with the brightness of their pleasure, lit with the glow of them flitting back and forth, congratulating each other, sharing stories of their capture.

Yue watched over them. He took his duty to them seriously, unlike certain fat, lazy Sun guardians he could name.

He watched, but he did not rejoice with them.

A soft breeze touched the feathers of his wings and he glanced over, unsurprised to see Windy. She stood beside him, hands clasped and eyes lowered. “Yue-sama.”

“Yes?” he asked, when she hesitated.

“I beg your pardon,” she murmured softly.

Yue shrugged one shoulder. “There is no need. It wasn’t your fault.” Not Windy’s fault that he had been captured himself, subdued and humbled by a little slip of a girl with bright eyes and an open smile. “It was your Master’s power and intent.”

“Yes.” Windy smiled herself, almost as brightly as their new Master, hands pressed to her breast. “A warm power.” Her eyes met Yue’s properly once more. “I think… you will like it, too, Yue-sama.”

Yue sniffed. “It will be quite some time before she is strong enough to see.”

“Ah.” Windy’s smile was, perhaps, a bit wistful as she bowed to him and moved back among the other cards, who seized on her happily. She had been with the new Master the longest; everyone wanted to hear her stories.

As the celebration rolled on Yue caught a number of glances in his direction, flickering toward him between laughter. He answered them only with his presence; he wasn’t sociable, the way Keroberos was.

After a while, though, shadow moved in the blue and Dark slipped up to lean delicately against his shoulder. He didn’t unfold his arms, but he did curve a wing in over her. Dark was, of all of them, the closest to his own nature; she was comfortable enough to have here. She knew the value of silence, for one thing.

“The bell did not give her any power,” Dark said, eventually.

At that, Yue stirred. “I know.” He glanced down at the spilled shadow of her hair. “The bell was of our alignment. I saw what it did.” And it hadn’t been made to do anything but bridge the girl’s own power to Windy. His mouth tightened. “If she had not defeated me by her own power, I would not have chosen her as Master for you.” No matter how determined Clow had been to make him.

“Oh, Yue-sama.” Dark sighed. “You can choose for yourself, as well, you know,” she said softly.

Yue looked away, long hair swinging against his back. “That is not my purpose.” That much had been made plain; twice. Once by his abandonment and again when Clow guided another’s power to take him.

Dark looked up at him with a faint smile. “A new Master is new life to us. A new life gives us all new purpose, don’t you think?” She stood on her toes to brush a light kiss over his cheek and slipped away as Yue blinked at her.

He thought of calling her back to ask what she meant, but she had already found Light and twined fingers with her, and he knew the two of them had been unhappy to be separated while the Cards were scattered.

He settled back to watch over them. He would hold to his duty for however long it would last. It seemed to be all he had.

End

Last Modified: Sep 26, 08
Posted: Apr 10, 07
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Property Values

Takes place just after the manga ends. Touya and Yukito decide to move in together. Drama with Romance, I-3

Some things didn’t change, and Touya found that comforting. Years ran on, but Sakura still overslept, Yuki still loved stuffed breads for lunch, and he and Yuki still did their homework together in the evenings.

Yuki pushed back from the low table and sprawled on the floor with a sigh.

“You done?” Touya chewed on the end of his pen for a moment before filling in the last valence on his worksheet. So far, college Chemistry was mostly review; it was nice to have a bit of a break but he did find himself wondering when they were going to get on with things.

“Not yet. I can’t concentrate tonight.”

At that Touya looked up. He still twitched that kind of statement from Yuki, even a year after the last big trouble ended. “You all right?”

“Hm? Oh.” Yuki laughed. “It’s nothing like that, To-ya. Calm down.”

Touya settled back. “What is it, then?”

Yuki stared up at the high ceiling, fingers tracing over the tatami under him. “I think… I want to move out of this place,” he said softly. He gave Touya a quick smile. “I know it’s true, what you said about my memories that are real.” He looked back up, eyes shadowed again. “But there are so many that aren’t real attached to this place.”

Touya dropped his pen and scooted around the table until he could brush light fingers through Yuki’s hair. “Do you know where you want to move yet?”

Yuki smiled, small and rueful. “Not really. Just that I want to go.” A small laugh escaped him. “Besides, it doesn’t feel quite right, anymore, living in one of Eriol-kun’s properties on money that he set up for me.”

Touya could understand that; sometimes he thought it would have been better if Yuki had never wondered about his grocery bills. Of course, that would probably have taken yet more of Eriol and/or Clow messing with Yuki’s head, and then Touya would have really had to kill the man. “Hm.” He toyed with a soft lock of Yuki’s hair as he thought. “I’d say you should move in with us, except I have this feeling Li is going to be doing that before too long.” He growled at the mere thought. “Tou-san won’t let the kid live alone once he finds out about that. He had just better make both of them finish high school before they do… anything.”

Yuki laughed at him. Touya glowered. The idea of Li living in the same house as his sister did not make him happy, not even with Tou-san as chaperone, not even if though would be nice to have extra hands for chores.

Actually…

Touya’s fingers slowed, running through Yuki’s hair as he turned his new thought over. It could work. “We could get a place together,” he finally said, looking at the pale, feathery fall of Yuki’s hair instead of his eyes. “If you want.”

“Touya.” Yuki’s eyes caught him after all; it took Touya a moment to shake himself free from the brightness in them.

“Well. We can look around this weekend, then.” Honestly. You’d think he’d just offered a year ticket to an all-you-can-eat buffet. His mouth curled as he looked down at Yuki.

Yuki laughed, sudden mischief gleaming behind his innocent smile. “And Sakura-chan can have Li-kun and Kero-chan for her chore-team, to take care of your father, right?”

“Yep.” Having seen the way his sister ordered the bath sponge around, the thought pleased Touya about as much as any thought involving Li could.

“To-ya, you’re mean!” Yuki didn’t sound like he minded that, though. His hands were gentle as he reached up to bury them in Touya’s hair and draw Touya down to him.

“She’s my sister,” Touya muttered before he lost track of anything but the warmth of Yuki’s mouth under his.

Come to that, he could think of other reasons having their own place would be a good thing…

End

Last Modified: Feb 09, 12
Posted: Apr 13, 07
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Bitter and Salt

Touya finds out a few things about what Yue likes, despite Yue’s complete cluelessness. Drama with Pre-Romance, I-3

September

“Kero-chan!!”

Touya never regretted spending his weekends at home; it was nice to see family so often, his first year living away. But it sure got loud sometimes. He shook his head as Keroberos galloped out of the kitchen with Sakura hot on his heels, cheerfully swiping the last bits of frosting off his muzzle.

It was a good thing Tou-san had hidden the second cake well back in the pantry.

There went both his tasters, though. He eyed Yue, still standing by the window, aloof from his counterpart’s dessert-stealing tricks. Of course. Normally he’d ask for Yukito back, when it came to food, but Yue hadn’t been out much, lately. Besides, Touya had gotten suspicious of why, exactly, Yue never ate or drank, and this seemed like a good chance to test it.

“Yue,” he said casually, holding out a spoonful of apple pie filling. “Taste this and tell me if it’s good.”

Yue blinked at him. “I don’t eat,” he said, as if he thought Touya might have forgotten.

“I’ve noticed. There’s nothing to stop you from it, if Keroberos is any indication, though. You taste things, right?” Yue’s nose wrinkled just slightly and Touya nodded to himself. He’d bet he was right. “So taste this.”

Yue stared at him for a long moment before, with manifest unwillingness, taking the spoon. He maneuvered it into his mouth as if trying not to actually touch it and bit down with a stoic expression.

When the expression changed it was mostly in his eyes: a slight widening, a small relaxation of tight brows. Touya made a satisfied little hm.

“It’s… good,” Yue said, finally.

“You don’t like sweets,” Touya stated. He started spooning his mostly unsweetened filling into the crust. “I’ll remember that.”

Yue was back to looking at him with bafflement. “Why?”

Touya rolled his eyes. Sometimes he really wondered about Yue. “So we can have things you’ll like, too,” he explained with pointed patience.

“Oh.” Yue said it so softly that Touya looked over at him and caught the moment of confusion and hesitance on his face. And then it was gone and Yue was cool and withdrawn again.

Touya snorted. Yue was stuck with the family, now; he might as well get used to it.

November

Sakura flopped down on Touya’s couch like she was still ten years old. “Why do magic creatures keep coming to me? I have homework!”

“You’re not the only one,” Touya noted, though he was sneakingly pleased that his sister and her retinue had stopped at his place to rest on her way home instead of just dropping Yue off. He had brotherly duties to keep up with, of course, so he didn’t say that; instead he smirked at her. “The monsters all just want to visit their relative, probably.”

Sakura revived instantly to scowl at him. Touya smirked wider and set a cup of tea down in front of her, careful to keep his feet out of reach. She sniffed and wrapped her hands around it.

“They’re drawn to strong magic,” Li said, matter of fact enough that Touya suspected he’d had to deal with this too. He sipped his tea quietly, sitting close by Sakura. Hovering, really.

Touya grudgingly supposed he approved of that.

He pushed the sugar dish toward Keroberos, who had already reverted to small, probably to get the most out of his sweets. Touya snorted and set a cup of black coffee down in front of Yue.

Yue looked up at him inquiringly.

“Coffee. Try it.” Touya settled on the floor beside their table, pouring his own tea.

Yue picked up the cup and then paused. Quiet as their exchange had been, it had drawn the wide-eyed attention of the rest of the room. Touya didn’t look back at Yue, but he reached out swiftly to rest two fingers under Yue’s cup, stopping him from setting it back down.

“Touya…” Yue’s voice was barely audible, and he was trying not to look anyone in the eye. A faint flush snuck over his cheeks.

“Try it,” Touya repeated calmly, in direct contrast to the dark look he was giving the rest of the room. There was a sudden clatter of spoons and saucers from the other three.

Yue kept his eyes fixed on his cup as he tasted the coffee, delicately. Touya, watching for it from the corner of his eye, caught Yue’s slow breath out and the faint relaxation of his shoulders, and smiled.

A momentary flicker of a smile answered him before Yue recalled himself and sobered again.

Yue finished his coffee quietly before wrapping his wings around himself. The brightness parted to show Yukito, who stretched and smiled. “Are we all done?”

“Yes! Thank you, Yukito-san!” Sakura chattered to Yuki, filling him in on the afternoon while Touya poured tea into the extra cup he’d brought out and handed it over.

His sister’s boyfriend was watching him thoughtfully.

Two days later a package of books on Chinese medicine and health arrived, full of charts, and lists, and diagrams of elements and tastes and heat versus cold. Touya hated it when That Boy was helpful; it made it a lot harder to stay properly mad at him for stealing Sakura.

He sighed and settled down on the couch to read about the elemental alignment of the Moon, and the food associated with it.

February

Touya tossed a package of salted seaweed snacks into the shopping basket. Yuki’s brows rose. “I didn’t know you liked those, To-ya.”

“I don’t, much. But I think Yue will.”

“Ah.” Yuki nodded, satisfied. After a moment though, he cocked his head at Touya. “How do you figure out what he’ll like? We don’t seem to like the same things.”

Touya’s mouth quirked. “Well, at first it was just giving him stuff that wasn’t sweet. But those books the Brat sent me…” He frowned, running his finger down the row of noodle packages. “They don’t have your favorite brand. Is Shirayuki okay?”

“Sure.”

“It seems that Chinese medicine has a lot in common with Chinese magic systems,” Touya said quietly. “Yue and that bath sponge both seem to like tastes that match their alignment.” He frowned some more. “Which is… Well, maybe it’s all right. Maybe magic creatures don’t need to be balanced the way humans do.” He looked at Yuki, frown softening because Yuki was good at doing that to him, even when he was worried. “But you and Yue are the same; and you like eating all kinds of things, the way a human would. So I think it might be better for him, too.”

Yuki chuckled softly, with that inward look that meant he was paying attention to his other self. “I think he’s going to tell you to mind your own business, next time he sees you.”

Touya snorted. As if that was going to stop him; besides, Yuki’s health might be at stake, here, too. You never knew. “Anyway,” he tossed a packet of Thai curry powder into their basket, “next time we make curry, we should see if he likes spicy food.”

Yuki’s hand lingered on Touya’s arm for a moment. “Thank you. For worrying about both of us.”

Touya took a moment before they came out of the aisle to ruffle Yuki’s hair. “Always.”

For a moment Yuki had a very odd expression on his face. And then he smiled. “Yes,” he agreed softly, definitely. “Always.”

Touya declined to comment on that and made for the case of fish and meat instead. He did sometimes wonder whether a day would come when the things Yuki and Yue communicated to each other would become his business. He kind of hoped so.

But not today.

End

Last Modified: Feb 09, 12
Posted: Apr 13, 07
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From Old Wood

Yukito notices something a little different about Touya lately, and discusses it with Yue. In a way. Drama, I-3

Yukito did not perceive magic, as his other self did. That this often meant he did not perceive his other self was something he put down as one of life’s little ironies.

That did not stop him from observing the results of magic.

When shimmers of heat danced around the Kinomotos’ clothesline on a cool, cloudy day, he didn’t need anyone to tell him that Sakura-chan was experimenting with Fiery to dry the clothes before the rain came. He figured that out even before he helped patch the scorch on Touya’s jeans.

When time flickered and he suddenly found himself elsewhere, he could guess that Yue had decided Sakura-chan needed him, even without the clue of Sakura herself, looking anxious and asking if she’d interrupted anything.

And although he’d never seen spirits or ghosts himself, he knew what it looked like when Touya was seeing them.

He thought perhaps that was why he was the first one to notice.


Touya’s head lifted from his notebook a second before the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it.”

The click of the door opening was followed by the bright sound of Sakura-chan’s voice. The progression was so familiar from two years ago that Yukito didn’t actually notice until the third time it happened.


A classmate dashed through crowded halls to catch Touya’s shoulder urgently. “Kinomoto-kun! The last lecture, can I borrow your notes?”

Yukito paused as Touya fished out his notes and handed them to Suiko-san. She had come from directly behind them, but Touya hadn’t seemed at all surprised when she grabbed him.

“I need them back by Friday,” Touya called after Suiko-san as she sprinted off again.

After that, Yukito watched more closely.


Touya paused with his hand on the gate.

“To-ya?” Yukito cocked his head. They’d gone home this way so that they could stop into see Touya’s father.

“Mm, I was just wondering if Kaa-san was visiting today.” Touya’s mouth tilted a little wryly. “You know he always feels a little weird about talking to her when I can’t see her any more.”

That was true enough, but Yukito was starting to wonder whether Oji-san would keep needing to worry about that.


Yukito paid some careful attention to how he felt, after that. If Touya’s magic was returning, did that mean something had gone wrong? Was Yue going to starve, and Yukito with him, again?

He didn’t feel any more than usually tired or hungry, though. Neither Sakura nor Kero-chan gave him any strange or concerned looks.

Finally he chose a day when Touya had an evening lab and went out into their yard to lie back in the grass and look up at the moon. After a while he closed his eyes and just listened to his own breath.

This didn’t always work. He was fairly sure Yue had to be willing to make an effort too.

For a long time there was only the rush of his breath in and out, and the cool darkness behind his eyelids. Finally, though, he felt the odd echo in his heart that he’d been waiting for. When Touya asked, Yukito had told him it was like listening to music and not being quite sure whether there was one violin or two playing. He wondered, sometimes, whether it was as disconcerting for Yue as it was for him.

Touya, he thought. Magic. He let the thoughts go like dandelion puff from an open hand.

What came back was stronger than usual, like a thread of cool water in a warm pool. Security. Surety.

He also thought Yue might be puzzled, but since he was puzzled too it was harder to tell.

An image of Sakura-chan floated through his head.

Ah. Perhaps Yue had started to draw on his Master’s magic, then? Yukito felt a bit wistful at that thought. That was foolish, though; he shouldn’t be so selfish as to grudge the return of Touya’s magic just so that he could keep that particular connection. It wasn’t like there weren’t others, between them.

Abruptly enough to make him gasp, the echo was gone and he was staring up at the moon, small and high in the sky. He huffed a soft laugh. Perhaps he hadn’t been the only one feeling wistful. Or feeling embarrassed about it.

Yukito levered himself up, brushing grass off. Whatever was happening, Yue didn’t think it was any problem for them. That was all he needed to know. If Touya’s magic really was returning, they could reassure him that it was entirely a good thing.

A fugitive twinge caught his heart.

Or someone’s heart, anyway.

Yukito looked up at the moon, frowning. Perhaps he would have to try Yue again later, on the subject of Touya.

A second of chill annoyance brushed over him, and he smiled. Fortunately, he’d gotten more of the stubbornness than Yue had.

End

A/N: The total erasure of Touya’s magic is one of those little things that bugs me. It runs against the general flow of how magic is shown to work in the CCS-verse, with nary a scrap of explanation why. (Besides the basic CLAMP-logic that angst > plot.) This being the case, I choose to believe that Sakura, the one who tells the readers that Touya’s magic is gone for good, was mistaken.

Last Modified: May 15, 12
Posted: Apr 15, 07
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Degrees of Silver

Yue likes the rain. Drama, I-2

The doors to the porch were open, and the sound of heavy, steady rain came through.

Along with sprays of water. Touya shook his head and went to close the doors, wondering who had forgotten to latch them firmly. He paused with his hand on the doorknob, though, because Yue was standing outside.

Yue perched at the very edge of the porch, almost in the downpour, face tipped up. His eyes were closed. “You can close the door if you like,” he murmured.

Touya’s mouth quirked. “Won’t your feathers get wet in all this?”

Yue shrugged. “It’s a fair price for peace.”

“Peace?” Touya stepped out onto the porch and held a hand off the side. The weight of the rain nearly drove his arm back down.

Yue opened his eyes and Touya was surprised to see that they were, indeed, at peace—even a little dreamy. “This is the best season of summer, for me. The rains. The influence of the sun isn’t as harsh.” His eyes drifted closed again and he let out a slow breath. “When the rains are all around me they soften the world. The sound closes in and gives me solitude.”

Touya smiled, a bit rueful; he could take a hint. “I’ll let you enjoy it, then.”

As he turned away, though, Yue said, softly, “I don’t mind you.”

Touya stood still for a long moment before turning back. He came to lean against the rail beside Yue, and closed his eyes, and listened to the curtains of rain closing them in together.

End

Last Modified: Feb 09, 12
Posted: Apr 15, 07
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Drink Deep

An encounter under a tree on a sunny afternoon leads to all sorts of new possibilities. Drama with Fluff, I-3

“The Master is home aga—”

Touya looked up with a smile for the news that Sakura was back home safe. He lifted a brow at the expression on Yue’s face, though. He wouldn’t have thought there was anything alarming about sitting in the shade of a tree and reading, but Yue stood like he’d been turned to stone, staring.

After a few moments, Touya wondered if he should poke him or something.

Finally, though, Yue shook himself and cleared his throat. “She’s home again and well.”

“Good to know. Well, if you’re off duty, quit standing at attention.” Touya patted the ground. “Sit down and take a breath.”

Yue actually took a step back, and that made Touya pay attention. Yue wasn’t often that skittish any more. “Come on,” he half-coaxed and half-ordered, holding out a hand. “You can tell me how she liked Hong Kong.”

Yue wavered, and for a moment Touya thought he would bolt and return to Yukito, but slowly he did step toward Touya. “She enjoyed it,” he said, voice low. “The Li family approved of her, of course.”

“Of course,” Touya agreed, dryly. If it wasn’t enough for them that their son was head over heels in love, Sakura was the Master of the Cards. He kept his hand out. Yue stood beside him, looking at it like it might be dangerous. “Did the Brat come back, too, or did he stay to visit longer?” Touya took Yue’s hand, lightly, tugging down.

“He…” Yue sank to his knees. “He returned as well.” His eyes were wide, but he didn’t pull away.

Touya huffed a short laugh and pulled sideways. “So, did you have fun too?” Yue wavered forward, and Touya kept tugging until Yue half tumbled down to sit beside him against the tree.

“I don’t… that is…”

Touya let Yue’s hand go and settled back against the tree, looking at his book again. “Or you can complain, if you want, you know,” he prompted. “People do that, when they get back from trips.”

“…Keroberos was rather loud.” And Yue sounded oddly breathless.

Touya smiled. “I bet you didn’t get much sleep.” After a moment he added, “This is a nice spot for a nap.”

“I…” Abruptly, Yue vanished in a flurry of light and feathers and Yukito was sitting next to him instead.

Touya sighed.

“Ah. I thought we might be home.” Yuki slipped an arm around Touya and leaned into him. “I’m back,” he announced, laughing.

Touya smiled and pulled him closer. “Welcome home. So, did you have a good trip?”

“Of course. It’s nice to travel, and Sakura-chan was having so much fun, seeing a new place.”

Touya nodded. He’d figured Yuki would enjoy himself; Yuki got along with people wherever he went. Before they got out the vacation pictures, though, he had another question. “I don’t suppose you know what would have bugged Yue about me sitting here reading a book?”

Yuki started to shake his head and then paused, frowning. “Hm.” He was quiet for a long moment. “I’m not sure,” he murmured, at last. “It’s like remembering a dream, long after you wake up. But… I think it might have reminded him of something to do with Clow.”

“Ah. Of course.” Touya made a face. Yue only ever got that flustered when something touched on his past, and catch him talking about it to anyone. He was a little surprised when Yuki kept speaking.

“It was sunny.” Yuki’s voice was distant. “With cool shadows under a tree. And he wondered about the book, but Clow-san just laughed and told him to take a nap while it was still warm enough out.”

Touya winced. Right. So, no telling Yue he should take naps; he’d have to add that to the list. The really long list. He was incredibly glad Yuki had gotten the sweet, outgoing, warm side of those two; if both of them had been prickly and wounded and neurotic, he’d have gone crazy. “That sounds like the opening of a book,” he said, leaning down to drop a kiss under Yuki’s ear and distract him.

Yuki laughed and turned to catch Touya for a proper kiss, and Touya decided he could think more about Yue later.


It was later the same week that he happened across some loose pages on Yuki’s desk, describing the sun and shade and a magician enjoying a lazy afternoon with his familiars. At the top of the first page were the words “Chapter One”.

Touya grinned. Who knew? Maybe Yuki wasn’t going to wind up in architecture after all.

End

Last Modified: May 15, 12
Posted: Apr 15, 07
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After Frost

Life gets back to normal for Touya. Drama with Fluff, I-3

Between his own need to decide on a career within the next year and the fuss of Sakura’s first year of high school, Touya really didn’t think the family needed to deal with a Portentous Letter from Hiiragizawa. But that was, unfortunately, what was sitting on the table when he and Yuki arrived, on Saturday.

He scowled at it.

Sakura tore open the outer envelope that it had come in. “…Mizuki-sensei writes a lot, of course, but I haven’t heard from Eriol-kun in so long. I hope everything’s going well.” She shook the inner envelope out onto the table and reached for it.

Touya’s nerves twanged and he was grabbing Sakura’s hand before he could think.

She started and stared up at him. “Onii-chan?”

“He did something to it,” Touya stated. He didn’t know what, but he was very sure that something was odd about the letter. And he didn’t trust Hiiragizawa any further than he could throw his own motorcycle.

Sakura’s brows wrinkled. “But…”

“Check it, Sakura,” Li put in, holding a hand over the letter. “I think he’s right.”

Sakura held out her own fingers to it, eyes drifting closed. After a moment they flashed open again. “It is!” She frowned. “But it doesn’t feel…” She picked the envelope up and Touya had to stifle a yelp of protest.

With a bang, tiny confetti-like sparks of light fluttered around them. Sakura and Tou-san laughed, while Touya tried to get his heart started again. Yuki patted him on the back, though he was grinning a bit, too.

Kero-chan snorted. “That’s him all over.” Then he turned over in midair to try to catch the sparks between his paws.

Sakura paused. “But… Onii-chan, how did you know?” She looked at him with wide eyes. “You don’t have… I mean you gave…” she ran down to a flustered halt, nibbling her lip.

Touya rolled his eyes and ruffled her hair. “Don’t have any magic. You can say it, Monster.” She growled at him, at that, and he laughed. Some things never changed. “I just knew. Well-trained nerves, probably.”

“You’ve known that kind of thing a lot more often lately,” Yukito said, softly.

Sakura’s hands clasped on each other. “I thought it was for good.” Her whole face was brightening like sunrise. “You mean it’s coming back?”

Touya frowned. He hadn’t expected it, so he hadn’t actually thought about it. “I don’t know.”

“I wondered about that,” Li said quietly. The entire room turned to look at him and he lifted a hand palm up. “Magic usually works a lot like chi. It can be depleted. It can get blocked. But to affect the source of it… that takes an incredible amount of power.” He smiled at Sakura. “Power like yours, after all your trials taught you to find it.” He tipped his head, looking back at Yukito. “Yue was starved for magic when he took Touya-san’s. I thought that might have been why it all seemed to go away. But I couldn’t imagine where Yue had found the power to affect the root of Touya’s magic that way.”

“Huh.” Touya rubbed a hand over the back of his head, surprised by how calm he felt about all this; losing his magic had been a serious shock. Shouldn’t regaining it be at least a little strange? “Well, I guess we’ll see.”

“Hm.”

They looked at Tou-san, who was reading the letter with a faint smile.

“I think we can assume that it’s true.” Tou-san chuckled and read out loud. “‘We will be returning to Japan soon; Kaho has had an excellent job offer there. Incidentally Kaho says that congratulations are likely in order for Touya-kun. I’m pleased to hear that my speculations were correct. Sincerely, Eriol.'”

Sakura clapped her hands and flung her arms around Touya’s neck. “That’s wonderful!”

“Ack!” Touya fielded his sister, catching the corner of the table for balance. She was still short, but a lot bigger than she had been a few years ago.

He also spared a moment to be thankful that Tou-san didn’t have any memories of being such a close-mouthed bastard to influence him.

“Okay, great, good news, now how about if we get started on lunch?” he suggested, putting Sakura down firmly.

Kero-chan perked up instantly. “There’s going to be tamago-yaki, right? Sakura said there would be! Tamago-yaki!”

Yeah, he could always count on the bath sponge.

In the bustle of getting ingredients out and deciding who would chop and who would stir and who got to set the table, Yuki touched Touya’s arm and leaned close. “I’m glad. So is Yue, I think.”

“You’re sure both of you are all right?” Touya murmured.

Yuki smiled. “I’m sure. I asked, a few months back. I think he thinks we’re drawing on Sakura-chan’s magic, now, so yours can build back up.”

Touya eyed that smile and sighed, ruefully. It was hard to tell when Yuki was being clueless and when he was just enjoying being a step ahead; they looked a lot the same. He brushed Yuki’s cheek gently with the backs of his fingers. “If you’re all right, then that’s all that matters.”

He thought twice about that, he had to admit, when Kaa-san appeared after lunch, laughing, saying she’d have to be more careful about hovering over him now that he could catch her doing it again.

But even then, he thought it was still pretty much true.

End

Last Modified: Feb 09, 12
Posted: Apr 27, 07
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Sweet and Spicy

Touya keeps trying to draw Yue out, and Yue wrestles with his fear of losing again. Drama with Romance, I-4

Touya was enjoying a very nice afternoon, lying on the couch with a book in one hand and Yuki dozing against his chest. Yuki had finished his writing for the day, making three chapters of his second novel to send along to his agent tomorrow. The day was just cool enough to make Yuki’s warm weight feel extra nice. In fact, it was just about a perfect afternoon.

So of course it was interrupted.

Not by the rush of light and feathers that abruptly filled Touya’s arms; that wasn’t an interruption. No, it was when Yue opened his eyes and said, "The Master needs me."

Touya grunted; of course Yue wouldn’t have come out just to chat. He smoothed back Yue’s hair, as he’d been stroking Yuki’s. "Think you’ll be back for dinner?" Food was starting to be a good way to get Yue to spend some time acting like a normal person.

Yue started, seeming to notice for the first time that he was lying against Touya. "I… I don’t…" He set his hands against Touya’s chest, pushing himself back, eyes wide.

"Oof," Touya complained, and pulled Yue back down so he could breathe. "Legs off the couch first," he directed. "You really need to get more used to this."

Yue lay still for a moment before he tried to sit up again, more slowly this time. "I… wouldn’t wish to interrupt more than I do." He looked away, color sneaking over his cheeks.

"You aren’t interrupting," Touya told him firmly. How many times was he going to have to say this before both of them understood? "Whichever shape you are, whichever you you are, it’s still you. You belong here." Yue was starting to look alarmed, and Touya sighed, going back to the less intimidating questions. "Do you think you’ll be back for dinner?"

"I… I’ll try," Yue said softly.

"Good."


Touya sat at the kitchen table, triangulating between a medical text, a cookbook, and a book of magic.

Cooking for Yue was more difficult than your average menu planning.

"Apricot ginger glaze for the chicken," he muttered, scribbling notes, "bean salad maybe? Yeah that should be okay since it’s fall. Not too much rice, though. Hm. Lemon ice for dessert?" He chewed the end of his pencil for a minute. "Better make it green tea ice—better balance."

He did more homework to cook food for his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s other self than he’d done for his chemistry degree, he swore. Well, at least now he know why Yuki was so fond of wheat breads.

Yue got back just as dinner was sizzling and chilling nicely; Touya decided it was a good omen. "Set the table," he directed, handing Yue the plates. The more prosaic he could make Yue’s life, the better, he figured. "See if you like the chicken, tonight."

Yue set the table, but he did it slowly, with a lot of little glances at Touya. He hesitated before sitting down. "I shouldn’t," he said, low. "Yukito…"

"I made dinner for you," Touya told him firmly, hanging up his apron and grabbing his own chair. "You should eat it."

Yue finally sat. Touya kept him busy through dinner by asking what Sakura had been up to. Apparently what should have been a tame consultation with a wizard from up north had turned into a ghost hunt through the whole town and half the next. Yue actually smiled faintly over the bean salad, though that might just have been satisfaction at recounting how Keroberos got himself stuck trying to slide underneath someone’s porch. After dinner, Touya handed Yue a dish towel without asking and recounted his hours lecturing that day as they washed the dishes, just as normal and domestic as he was capable of making things.

Yue seemed puzzled by the whole thing, which made him want to bang his head against the wall.

When they were done and Yue just nodded quietly to him, wings starting to open, Touya decided he had had enough. "Yue." He reached out and gathered Yue into his arms, wings and all. Yue stiffed and Touya sighed; was it always going to be like this? He touched Yue’s jaw gently, meeting wide, ice-colored eyes. "Is this really so hard to understand?" he asked quietly.

"I don’t… I… yes," Yue stammered, and Touya’s mouth quirked; for all his reserve, Yue was very straightforward.

"I’ll try to make it easier, then," he said, and leaned in and kissed Yue’s forehead softly. "How’s this: I want to be with you. All of you."

Yue stared at him, shivering, lips parted, and Touya wished he could think that was invitation and not just shock. When Yue clung abruptly close he felt a flash of hope, but the next instant he was holding only light, and then Yukito was leaning against him, shaking his head.

"What on earth?" Yuki murmured.

Touya sighed, letting his head drop to Yuki’s shoulder. "Argh."

"Ah. I see." Yuki stroked his hair. "Don’t worry, Touya. We’ll get there. Is there leftover ice cream?" he added hopefully.

Touya laughed, which he thought was probably the point. "I made cookies for you. Come on. There’s tea ready too."


Yue stood at the furthest edge of the Cards’ Place and tried to be calm. The memory of Touya’s lips on his made it hard. Other memories kept slipping through his mind, even here—of Mirror blushing when the others admired her new hair ribbons, of even Watery allowing that the Master’s brother was very kind, of Dark looking at him from the corner of her eye.

He couldn’t think about these things!

"Yue-sama?"

He looked up, startled, to see Dark standing by him, brows drawn down in worry. "Yue-sama, are you… are you well?"

"I’m fine," he told her flatly, folding his arms tighter.

She tipped her head and smiled at him softly. "It’s the Master’s brother again, isn’t it?"

Yue drew himself up; he wasn’t going to have any backtalk from the Cards, not even one of the highest. Dark sobered and bowed to him in apology. "Forgive me, Yue-sama. It’s only that I wish you could be happier."

"He’s mortal." Yue looked aside. "There’s no happiness in that, not for me." That had been abundantly demonstrated once already; Yue didn’t feel any need to learn it again.

Dark hesitated a moment and came to stand before him, taking up one of his hands in hers. "Yue-sama, happiness and sadness are like Light and Dark. They are not separate." She looked up at him gravely. "You are trying to separate them, to deny happiness so you won’t risk sadness. But in doing so, have you left yourself anything but the old pain?"

Yue started to pull away, not wanting to hear this or think about what it meant, and Light stepped from behind Dark. She bowed deeper than her sister, cautious as all the Sun-ruled Cards were with him, and held out her hands entreatingly. "Please, Yue-sama." Softly, she added, "You rule half the cards, under our Master. Your pain troubles us, as well."

Yue stilled, and looked back at Dark, startled. Dark didn’t quite meet his eyes, which was confirmation enough. "I see," he said. "I have neglected my duty to guard you, then."

"It’s not that!" Dark looked up at him, hands tightening on his. "It’s only… until now there was nothing to be done. But now there’s him."

Light set her hands on Dark’s shoulders, pressing close to comfort her. She looked past Dark at Yue with a soft smile. "As we are not separate, as joy and sadness are not separate, you and your other self are not separate either." She bent her head, diffident, but there was no yielding in her words. "Don’t you love him already?"

Yue closed his eyes. "Leave me," he said quietly. When the soft rustle of them had faded, he took a slow breath and let it out. Light could be as artlessly direct as the ruler of her half of the cards. Was she also right?

Would he be fighting it this hard, if she weren’t?

Yue sighed. He could almost hear those words in Clow’s voice.

Or was it Touya’s?


Yukito was being patient. Possibly a bit elaborately patient, but if that provoked Yue to stop lurking just past the edge of clear perception and actually communicate what had him on edge, Yukito thought it would have been in a good cause.

The front door clacked and Touya called, "I’m home!"

"Welcome back!" Yukito called back, tossing his notebook onto the table and starting to rise. Touya was there before he got all the way up, leaning down to kiss him lightly, and Yukito laughed. "Long day?" he guessed. Touya wasn’t usually quite that eager.

Touya flopped down onto the couch beside him with a groan. "I have got to get a lab job soon, the kids are going to drive me nuts."

Yukito was going to tease Touya about how he always said that and somehow always kept signing up to lecture again the next term when Yue stirred inside him and pressed a little—not rising to the surface, not yet, just asking. That was rare enough that Yukito smiled. "Someone else wants to talk to you," he murmured, and let himself sink down past the rise of Yue’s coolness, until it was Yue sitting on the couch, stiff and tense. Touya smiled at him anyway.

"Yue."

"Touya," Yue returned, hesitantly. He glanced at Touya and away, swallowing. "Did… did your day go well?" he finally asked, low.

Touya blinked at him for a moment, and then the smile was back, softer. "Pretty well. There are a few students I could do without, but most of them are good kids." He rested an arm casually along the couch, behind Yue’s shoulders, hand curved down just enough to make Yue feel welcome. "Thanks for asking." There was more than surface meaning in his words, and Yue had to bite back the panic that would normally have sent him fleeing down under Yukito. "I’m glad," he managed.

"Yue." Touya drew him closer, gently. "What’s wrong?"

The answer to that was so large that Yue could only shake his head at first. Touya just waited, though, patient with him and finally he said, "Clow left us." It was the first piece of the answer, at least.

"I won’t leave you," Touya answered immediately, too fast to have really even thought about it, and Yue looked directly at him, frowning.

"You will when you…" he bit off the last word. He didn’t want to say it out loud. Every creature of magic knew words had power.

"When I… oh." Touya’s snort startled Yue. "Death is no excuse, just look at my mother." He grinned as Yue stared, thoroughly taken aback. "No, not even then." He drew Yue closer, smile sliding away into seriousness. "I won’t leave you. Yukito. Yue. You. Not ever."

Yue found his fingers clenched tight in Touya’s shirt. It hurt. It hurt knowing that Touya was right, and this was something Clow could have given them and hadn’t.

But Touya did.

Touya’s fingers stroked his hair back, and his voice was quiet and sure. "I promise you."

Clow had never given his word. Touya did. It wouldn’t be the same, after he died, it wouldn’t be enough, but he promised even so. Maybe Yue wouldn’t be completely alone, after.

He leaned slowly against Touya, breathing as unsteady as if he’d just run a race against time, and a small, husky sound escaped him as Touya gathered him up close and warm. It was so warm, so good, it had been so long since Yue had felt that. Out of the warmth he finally found the courage to lift his head and touch his lips to Touya’s, for all he shivered when Touya’s arms tightened. It wasn’t with chill. Nor was it him alone; in that warmth, Yukito was there also, feeling with him, and Yue could feel the joy and pleasure of his other self’s response.

He could feel it too much, in fact, and without quite meaning to he slid under the rising brightness of Yukito’s open love until it was Yukito sliding his arms around Touya’s shoulders and kissing him slow and sure.

Yukito broke off with a soft laugh. "We’ll have to get better at that."

Touya was looking down at him, worried. "Is Yue all right?"

"Of course! He just isn’t used to this." Wasn’t used to being happy, that was; but he wasn’t sure it was time to tell Touya that yet.

Touya took a long breath, relief lightening his eyes. "I see. Well, you’re right then. We’ll have to get better at it."

Yukito laid a hand against his cheek. "Don’t worry, To-ya," he said, quietly. "We will."

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Jan 05, 10
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Six Pomegranate Seeds

Yue has a wish for his future; Touya is a little startled and a lot enlightened. Romantic Drama, I-4

Yue felt with his other self. He felt the warmth and satisfaction Yukito felt at lying snugly in Touya’s arms, felt the bright bubble of Yukito’s amusement as Touya tried to reach the lamp without letting go, even almost felt the soft pressure of Touya’s mouth against his.

But only almost, because feeling that warmth himself had sent him sinking down again, frightened by his own response, letting Yukito, who had practice with this and no loss weighing his memory, be the one to answer.

Even the echo of Touya’s weight and warmth settling over them made him gasp, and Yukito’s soft laugh was at him this time. His other self didn’t see why they both shouldn’t have what they wanted. He conveyed, at every opportunity, the idea that Yue obviously wanted to be with Touya.

He did. Oh, he did. But the fear wouldn’t leave him, not even with Touya’s promise. If Yue had to admit what he wanted, finally, he wanted to be with Touya, not just his ghost! If only Touya weren’t mortal. If only Yue weren’t immortal. If only he could cling to Touya’s warmth wherever it went, even out of this world. If only Yue had Clow’s power to change what he was. He closed immaterial eyes and sighed, retreating a little further from the sweetness of Touya’s hands against Yukito’s skin.

"…last night before we stay over with family," Touya’s words drifted down to him like snow, low and amused and suggestive, the way he could hear them himself if only…

"Were you thinking that should make a difference?" Yukito asked, mischief nearly sparkling.

"We’ll be in Eriol’s house, Yuki! Ruby Moon would probably try to watch!"

Yue frowned into nothingness at the thought. Ruby Moon had no right. Eriol should see to the manners of his current creations, even if, Yue had to privately admit, he had no history of doing so as Clow.

As Clow…

Yue’s eyes widened on interior darkness as Yukito’s closed on the lamp’s glow above and his lips curved under Touya’s.


Family gatherings were always pretty lively. With three magicians, four magic creatures and a ghost, Touya supposed they couldn’t be anything else, and he was pretty used to it by now.

"Kero-chan! Wait until you’re out of the car to change!" Sakura glared at the full-sized creature stuck half in and half out of their car.

"But I smell pudding!" Keroberos protested, rustling his stuck wings and flailing his paws.

Yuki had a hand over his mouth to stifle his laughing at the sight of Sakura pulling on her idiot sun-tiger’s paws while her husband pushed from inside the car. Touya didn’t take the time out to laugh. He had to admit, it was funny, but any minute now…

"Ah! And you brought snacks for me, too!" Ruby Moon bounced down the front steps and latched on to Touya’s arm. He rolled his eyes. Ruby never got tired of that joke.

A large, white wing cut abruptly between them.

Touya backed up until he no longer had a faceful of shining feathers, spitting out a stray curl of fluff. Sure enough, Yue was standing beside him now, glaring icy death at Ruby Moon.

Ruby pouted. "You’re so stingy, Yue. He has magic again, now; don’t you know it’s nice to share?"

Yue’s palm started to glow with ice crystals and Touya sighed. This was why Ruby never got tired of the joke, he was sure. He slipped around the wing still extended in front of him and laid a hand, gently, on Yue’s wrist. When Yue relaxed a hair, and Touya was sure there wasn’t going to be any immediate destruction, he shook his head at Ruby Moon. "Since you have someone to feed you a lot more then enough, isn’t it greedy to ask for snacks from other people?"

Ruby laughed. "Oh all right."

Yue glowered some more as Ruby skipped back up the stairs to lean on Eriol’s shoulder; Keroberos finally emerged from the car with a muffled squawk from Sakura, who he landed on; and their mother appeared, perched on a gate post, waving as their father’s car pulled up. Touya snorted a helpless laugh.

Just another family party.


Lunch was finished, Yuki had helped Keroberos decimate dessert, Sakura was whispering in a corner with Kaho while Li looked uncomfortable, and Yue was walking off down one of the mansion’s corridors with Eriol. Most of these things were not cause for alarm, but Touya had gotten increasingly edgy about just how much of Clow Eriol still was, and exactly what had happened between Clow and Yue.

Touya slipped after them.

It wasn’t that he intended to eavesdrop or anything like that. It was just that Yue always seemed to be ruffled after he talked with Eriol, and this time Touya wanted to know why. Yue wasn’t easy to soothe under the best of circumstances, and when he was ruffled he withdrew all over again, Yuki was uncomfortable, and Sakura worried. Touya watched as Eriol ushered Yue into one of the sitting rooms and settled against the wall, in the shadows across from the open door.

"What was it you wished to discuss?" Eriol asked, settling onto a small, brocaded couch by the long windows, in clear view of the door. Touya had his suspicions right then, but stayed still and quiet. Just in case Eriol didn’t know he was there.

Yue didn’t settle. He actually paced a few turns through the room. "I don’t want to go on," he said, low voice huskier than usual.

Eriol’s eyes narrowed for a moment. "Go on?"

Yue folded his arms tightly. "When Clow died, I went on. I didn’t know how to do anything else. But things that live don’t go on forever." He gave Eriol a brief, silver glare. "Clow didn’t." After a silent moment he continued. "I don’t want to go on again. I don’t want to sleep and be cold and wait, and know I have to lose again." He turned to face Eriol full on, wings flaring out. "When Touya leaves this life… tell me how to follow him."

Touya had to grip the wall to stay standing. He’d known that the time before Sakura had been bad, but this…! It took him a moment to recognize the amusement in Eriol’s raised brows, and then he had to stifle a furious growl.

"Even after years of practice, it’s still strange to be surprised." Eriol smiled and leaned back in the cushions. "I was going to speak to you about this today, to warn you." Dark eyes were kind, in a distant sort of way. "Unless you put a good deal of effort into stopping it, you’re going to pass away when Touya does, already."

Yue looked as stunned as Touya felt. "I am?"

Eriol shrugged. "You accepted the gift of his magic, to support you, years ago, until your Master could do so. To be honest, I had expected him to recover more of it by now. I believe the reason he hasn’t is that you are still bound to his magic for your life, rather than taking it from Sakura-san, even now that she’s grown strong enough."

"But…" Yue stammered, "he is recovering now. I thought… "

"He is," Eriol agreed gently. "But too slowly. He should have regained more of his strength by now. Unless he were still giving it to you."

"Oh." Yue was quiet for a moment. When he spoke his voice was steady. "So I will go with him?"

"Yes."

Yue nodded. "Thank you for telling me." Wings flashed in the glass doors to the garden, and he was gone.

After a moment, Eriol added to the air. "I meant to talk to you about it, too, of course. It still amazes me, sometimes, how things work out."

Touya finally shook himself and pushed away from the wall. "Without interference, you mean?" he asked as he crossed the room to the wide garden doors. The jibe was absent, though. He was thinking about Yue, not Eriol, or even Clow.

He found Yue out by a clump of birch trees, looking up at the moon. Yue’s arms were loose at his sides and he was smiling. Not the quick, furtive smile that came when he had been surprised by some good thought or happening, but the clear, steady smile of someone who was happy. The contrast made Touya’s chest tight. "Yue."

Yue turned and Touya didn’t think it was only the moonlight that made his eyes bright. "Touya." For once, Yue’s voice was not merely low, but soft. Touya was stunned wordless by the fact that the promise of being able to stay with him could make Yue so happy, so at ease. It was finally crystal clear to him what Yue’s reserve really meant. It had been unspeakable fear of being happy only to lose it all. He crossed the clearing in two quick strides and gathered Yue close.

He didn’t often touch Yue without some invitation; Yue’s usual coolness didn’t make it easy, and his flusterment at other times made Touya go slowly. But seeing that cool eased, seeing what Yue could be, should be, made Touya…

Well, it made him blazingly mad at Clow Reed, for one thing.

"I didn’t realize how bad it was," he said quietly. "I’m sorry."

Yue’s hands closed on his upper arms and he leaned back far enough to blink at Touya. "You didn’t… Oh." Bright eyes slid aside. "You… heard?"

"Yeah."

Yue looked at him levelly, some of his usual reserve folding back around him. "Do you mind? That your magic won’t completely recover?"

Touya snorted. "Of course I don’t mind. I can see Kaa-san again, what else would I need it for?" He laid a hand lightly on Yue’s back between his wings. "I… would rather you could be happy living on. But if you can’t be," he shrugged and smiled, "living my life with you is what I want to do. Doing the next bit together will be good too."

Yue tucked his chin down a bit, smile sneaking back. Touya brushed his thumb over the unaccustomed curve of Yue’s lips, and felt a little rush of warmth that Yue let him without flinching. "Tell you what," he said, a little teasing, "why don’t we go back in. And we can tell Ruby Moon that I’m yours for good and there’s no snacking allowed, ever."

A gleam lit Yue’s eye. "Hm."

Yeah, Touya had thought that idea would appeal to Yue. "Come on."

He left his hand resting on Yue’s back as they turned toward the lighted windows, and Yue’s feathers brushed delicately over it.


Yue could feel Yukito with him, feel Yukito’s unrestrained approval of how good it felt to rest in the circle of Touya’s arm as he leaned back against the window, and had to stifle a perfectly silly urge to blush.

Though perhaps it got away from him just a little when Touya, who seemed to have all his attention on the game of cards his sister was playing with Kaho, Spinel and Keroberos, eased him gently closer. If anyone asked, Yue was fairly sure Touya would explain he was only doing it for the sake of putting a permanent stop to Ruby Moon’s jokes. Sometimes he thought Touya had spent too much time with his other self, to learn that kind of innocent excuse making.

Still, it did feel very good. And if Keroberos cocked a knowing and affectionate ear at him more often than usual, and Sakura smiled like sunrise whenever she looked at him, and Eriol looked amused by the whole thing… well, perhaps that was all right. Perhaps it was all right to feel this happiness, to cherish it even.

This time, it would not be taken from him.

End

Last Modified: Feb 10, 12
Posted: Jan 08, 10
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